Intention: Win-Win (Compassion) or Win-Lose

Compassion

By Cathy Eck

 

Win-Win

As an entrepreneur, I read lots of business books.  When I finished one, I’d go to Barnes & Noble to get another.  One night, I stopped at B&N to get my latest fix.  I noticed a book on the display that said “Win-Win” on the cover.  I didn’t buy the book or even look inside it.  But I loved the sound of those words — win-win.

I bought another book and left the store.  But I couldn’t get win-win out of my mind.  I thought, “I’m going to start living my life that way.  If something isn’t win-win, I won’t do it.”  I didn’t realize that I’d just opened a gateway to compassion…one of the most important keys to initiation.

The next day, during a restroom break at work, I was washing my hands; and I dripped soap on the sink counter.  Those soap droplets caught my attention.  I wondered if just leaving them on the sink was win-win.  After all, we had a maid.  But then the soap would stay there looking messy until the maid came.  I also sensed an attitude of superiority in me as if I was too important to clean.  That didn’t feel win-win.  How could I possibly be more important than the woman who cleaned this restroom?  It really wasn’t win-win to pass the responsibility for my mess on to the maid even if it was technically her job.

Eventually, I pulled down some paper towel and cleaned up my mess.  But I hadn’t just cleaned the counter.  I’d also cleaned something in my mind.  I realized that when I reached that win-win place of thinking over this stupid little thing, I felt a deep calmness that I’d not felt since childhood.  It was way beyond anything I’d felt with meditation.  Meditating quieted my mind; but I was letting go of my shallow false masculine perspective, which freed my mind.

Back at my desk, I picked up a sales contract.  Suddenly it didn’t look win-win.  I called the potential customer and offered to make changes in his favor.  I wasn’t playing games anymore; I treated him the way I would want to be treated.  Again, I felt that peace.

This experiment started with a physical focus — doing that which was win-win.  But it shifted into something much bigger — letting go of any thought that wasn’t win-win.  That, I’d learn, is the meaning of compassion.  Compassion is what tames the false masculine.

 

Intention

About ten years later, people started to write books on the power of intention.  But there was no compassion in their intention setting.  They were thinking an intention before they did something like “Send me that which is for the highest good.”  It sounded nice, but they were washing their hands of responsibility — letting the universe decide what’s good for them.  Unfortunately, the universe doesn’t act as our fair and just concierge; we get what we believe.  This allowed the person to look compassionate without being compassionate.  Compassion doesn’t happen until we let go of beliefs.  It purifies our mind when we let go of the false masculine’s judgmental win-lose, good-evil, or right-wrong thoughts.

Others set intentions like, “I intend to win this race,”  or “I intend to lose twenty pounds this month.”  They were willing the future into submission for their benefit — another talent of the false masculine.

My intention to live from win-win caused me to go deep into my mind and to question my own thinking.  I was letting go before I even understood letting go.  To really get to win-win on any subject, I had to consider everyone that might be affected by the situation — the true application of the Golden Rule.  Letting go of the false masculine beliefs and judgments transformed my false physically-oriented perspective into the true, pure mental perspective of life.  Of course, when my mind was right, top of the triangle with no opposite thoughts, my behavior followed.  I couldn’t imagine harming another.

 

Compassion

Later, I decided to do my Ph.D. Dissertation on the initiation story of Jesus, and I used this same technique.  Unlike Christians, I didn’t want to copy Jesus’ actions; I wanted to understand, and find in myself, the mind of Jesus.  I’d take a Bible quote that didn’t make sense such as, “The meek shall inherit the earth.”  I started with the win-lose interpretations that I’d been taught:  “You have to be submissive to get to heaven.  You get rewarded for giving others what they want.”  None of the thoughts that popped into my mind felt win-win.  They didn’t produce that calmness or compassion.  So I kept dropping every belief that arose and kept digging for the truth.  You see, the truth wasn’t in some guru or in the ethers for channels to pick up; it was in my mind resting quietly below all of my false knowledge.

After letting go of many thoughts about this quote, I dropped into that now familiar place of win-win.  Jesus was talking about the mental, not the physical.  He was already in that compassionate place when he spoke.  When we let go of our beliefs and knowledge, our mind becomes meek, quiet, and pure.  We can’t imagine fighting or willing in order to get what we want.  And yet, our meek mind is extraordinarily powerful because our mind is so clear and creative.  We easily get whatever we focus our mind on — we inherit the earth.

I repeated this process for thousands of hours until I decoded the path of initiation from the story of Jesus.  He was a compassionate dude; and it wasn’t because of what he did but because of how he thought.  Then I saw it everywhere — initiation was embedded in many ancient myths and legends.  You can’t see it until you get the right perspective.  Real freedom, real peace, and real power are revealed when we exercise compassion and let go until our thinking becomes completely win-win for everyone.  That’s how we bring heaven back to earth.

God’s Slave and Religious Extremism Exposed

God's Slave

By Cathy Eck

 

God’s Slave

I recently saw a phenomenal movie at the San Diego Jewish Film Festival called “God’s Slave.”  I doubt that it will ever get wide distribution so my commentary is going to include a spoiler alert.  It wouldn’t have ruined it for me to know the entire true story.

It seemed like a crazy coincidence to see this movie just after my father sent me some Republican propaganda, which of course explained how Muslims deserve to be hated and feared.  The writer was clearly caught in his extreme fear of terrorism.  I told my dad that I neither hated nor feared Muslims.  The discussion ended at that point.

 

Hate and Fear

Hating and fearing others actually perpetuates the illusion.  This is why Jesus said not to judge others and to love your enemy.  It’s not spiritual advice.  It’s practical.

Our false mind tells us that hating, judging, fighting, or criticizing our enemy will somehow make things right.  But that doesn’t work and never has.  When we hate or judge someone, we’re in our false masculine mind focusing on our own projection.  When we love our enemy or let go of our beliefs about our projection, it disappears.  Love and truth are the most perfect healing forces, they dissolve what’s false and leave what’s true.  You can never go wrong with unconditional love.

Fear of the false God made him into the illusion’s superstar.  Fear generates emotion; the illusion feeds off of emotion.  When people stop fearing God or fighting over who’s God is the real God, the whole thought form will dissolve.

My dad’s ridiculous email started off with a very strange line.  It said, “Muslims believe Allah, a moon God.”  Now I don’t know if Allah was originally a moon god or not, and it’s not important.  The person writing the email was Christian; Christians have a fake God too, but they think their God is true.  Jesus was considered a Sun God.  Yahweh was most likely a sky/storm God.  But calling Allah a “moon” God got me thinking.  The Muslim religion is a religion of submission — that’s a feminine quality, like the moon.  If we hate and fear anything in the feminine role, we get fear and hate back.  The feminine is reflective, like a mirror.  So how can you blame the feminine?   You can’t.  What this Christian email writer was saying, without realizing it, was that Christians have created a mean ass projection, a big enemy; and they won’t let go.  They’d rather fear, die, and fight their own reflection.  How stupid is that?  It’s real stupid, but the Christian church has been doing that for ages.

The correction to this problem is so easy.  However, this is the problem with the false masculine role.  It sees it’s reflection in the feminine role; and then blames the feminine.  It breaks the mirror when all it has to do is let go.

 

Religious Extremism

In “God’s Slave,” the main character’s parents were murdered as a young child.  He becomes a slave of the system, and they groom him to become a suicide bomber.  He’s told that the best life comes after suffering, which is not any different than the Christian notion of heaven after suffering on earth.  He’s told to go live a normal life until he’s called.  This is also no different than Christians waiting for the call.  And he’s told that being a martyr is the ultimate.  Of course, Jesus was a martyr.  So it quickly becomes apparent that Christians and Muslims share the same ridiculous beliefs.  Let go of these core beliefs, and the battle ends.  You won’t fight when you don’t believe in suffering, when you know who you are, and when you realize Jesus was an initiate, not a martyr.

Eventually, the protagonist gets the call.  By this time, he’s married and has a child who he loves very much.  He’s got a sweet, compassionate side to him.  But he’s a slave to his handler, his authority, who is a slave to the false God.

He leaves his wife and child and reports for duty.  They have no idea that he’s about to become a martyr.  He’s strapped with explosives and gets in a car filled with explosives.  He is to drive to a synagogue.  But when he reaches the synagogue, which is filled with people, he’s stopped by a young child who is standing in front of his car and won’t move.  He gets out of the car, picks up the child, and hands him to his father.  And in that compassionate, caring act, his brainwashing cracks; he remembers his own child, who is about the same age.  He remembers love; and he aborts the mission.

His handlers are going to kill him as punishment.  They say he has disappointed Allah.  He calmly replies, “No Allah didn’t ask me to kill, you did.”   That’s the realization of someone who has seen the illusion for what it is.  They realize that they’re being controlled by humans, not God.  It’s the key to freedom and the gateway to heaven on earth.

 

Life as a Movie

Each of our lives is like that movie, and we have been brainwashed by our handers to believe the movie we live in is true when it’s really just an illusion.  We’re all slaves to other humans who call us into roles.  But love and compassion cracks our programming.

Like the suicide bomber, our mind was programmed to think we’re being punished or rewarded by God.  We break free when we realize that humans are controlling us, punishing or rewarding us — not God.  We aren’t free until we say “No” to our handlers and take back our free will.  Then we can use the power of truth and unconditional love to dissolve the illusion that has imprisoned us.  We can start allowing our own True Self to write the script for our life.  The protagonist of “God’s Slave” was not killed; he was free.

Roles: When the Feminine Pretends to be Masculine

Masculine or Feminine

By Cathy Eck

 

Confusion of Roles

Roles become very confusing when they’re not played as designed.  I’ve written about the masculine who pretends to be feminine — an authority figure who projects out an enemy, like Bush/Obama projecting Osama Bin Laden and Muslim extremism.  The leader pretends to be a victim of their own evil projection.  They want support/service/sacrifice from followers in order to slay the evil dragon.  If the followers succeed, the leader becomes a hero.  It’s a very old archetype.

This leader needs blindly obedient followers to slay his dragon.  We see such a person in the movie, “American Sniper,”  the true story of Chris Kyle, known as “The Legend” for his large number of kills.  Controversy has erupted over whether Chris Kyle was a hero or a predator.   Both labels are right in the illusion; both put Kyle at the bottom of the triangle.  If there’s a real enemy, then he’s a hero.  If there’s no enemy, then he’s a predator in the illusion.

Soldier is a strange role.  We believe a soldier is highly masculine.  Just try not to think of masculinity while watching Bradley Cooper play Chris Kyle.  It’s difficult!  However, soldier is actually a feminine role; soldiers salute, take orders, and blindly obey authority.  They’re feminine to the higher rank (who are feminine to their superior).  Soldiers only become masculine when they kill.  As observers, we get tricked by this role shift because we’re trained to look with physically-oriented eyes.

 

Roles Clarified

The original definition of roles made sense.  The masculine role followed the ideal of the sun and unconditionally gave.  The feminine role unconditionally received (like the moon or earth).  A person in a true masculine role would only think or speak the truth.  Their feminine side would be calm and receive original, creative ideas.

But a false masculine projects an illusion based on beliefs, which creates a fantasy, horror, or drama.  Those who are feminine followers to the false masculine leader, and honor their belief system, are no longer creating their OWN life.  Consequently, they’re either highly emotional or highly suppressed.  Only the person at the top of the pyramid — the supreme handler — has the script.  For most people, that supreme leader/handler is the false God — the imaginary leader of the illusion.  His constitution is the Old Testament.

 

Feminine Pretends to be Masculine

Remember, the false leader is an authority holding a masculine role but pretending to be feminine, a victim of someone or something outer.  This false leader pretends to be innocent; but that’s because we’re trained to ignore the fact that they projected their OWN enemy.

Any follower of a false masculine is playing a feminine role.  Look closely at Chris Kyle.  If you take out his back story, he appears to be a macho man — an expert marksman —  a killer of evil extraordinaire  — a hero.  But the movie, “American Sniper,” doesn’t ignore the back story.  He’s not masculine at all.  He’s feminine pretending to be masculine.  

Kyle’s story starts at birth, not at enlistment.  His dad rewarded him for his shooting skills as a young child.  He wanted dad’s approval and ignored his strong emotional signal screaming that killing wasn’t right.   He lived in Texas and attended a Fundamentalist church.  He quickly became feminine to his dad and religious authorities.  His dad tells him that he’s a protector, like a sheep dog; he buys the label because it sounds good.  By the time 9/11 occurred, he was one angry dude with a feminine, obedient mind.  From the physical perspective, he was masculine.  But from the mental perspective, he was completely feminine.

We fall into this quicksand because we confuse the physical and mental perspectives.  The True Self lives in the mental realm; the false self is physically focused.  From the mental, True Self perspective, we are NEVER an authority over another.  We can lead others for a common purpose, but we can’t be their ultimate authority.

Anyone who believes in the false God, is an expert of knowledge, or teaches information that has been pre-chewed by those in the illusion has a feminine mind.  Their position of authority doesn’t change their mindset.  They aren’t harmful unless we make them our authority.  I might take a class in Photoshop from a Photoshop expert to become a better user.  I’m glad s/he exists because the knowledge is useful; but I don’t let him/her tell me what to do with Photoshop.

Many people notice that the highest leaders appear to be feminine to some hidden hand, which is called God by some and the illuminati or big business by others.  If we could dissect the authority’s mind, however, I think we’d find that they’re actually following mom and dad’s illusion most of the time.

 

Level Confusion in Roles

When we follow any other human, we enter their fallen perspective because only our false self is outer directed.  A true leader will always point us back inside.  They won’t take our power even if we insist on giving it to them.

The calm demeanor of false leaders is often mistaken for the calmness of the True Self.  But false calmness is actually the result of the leader’s ability to project emotions on to followers.  We see the leader’s true colors when we refuse to serve their cause or fight their enemy.  The false masculine leader blames, guilts, and shames until we accept their beliefs and do their dirty work.  The say they’ll lead us to the promised land, but they actually spin us around in the desert forever.

To unravel this mess, we must clean up our own mind.  We have both of these false masculine characters within our false mind resting at the bottom of the triangle; often they’ve brought us rewards.  Sometimes, we fear the responsibility of leading our OWN life.  We fear making mistakes or not having answers.  But the only authority that is fair, harmless, and doesn’t err is our own True Self.  No one else can offer us better advice.

 

 

 

Motivation…Creation…It’s Not All About Doing

Nuts turn into giant oak trees.

By Cathy Eck

 

What’s Motivation?

I hear it every day from someone. I have no desires..no motivation…I’m lazy…bored with life. I don’t know what to do.

The curse of the illusion is hard work.  Some do hard physical work.  Others do hard mental work in order to figure out how to avoid doing hard physical work.  People who seek freedom are sick of hard work.  We discover letting go; then we turn it into hard work.

The freedom we desire is freedom from the physically oriented, fallen perspective.  When we fell into the illusion, we accepted lots of beliefs that made creating very hard and slow.  We became feminine to a false God (a slave driver).  We became slaves of his system.  Doing became boring, routine, and uncreative.

The popularity of motivational speakers, prosperity preachers, and life coaches is proof that people aren’t in touch with their natural inner motivation.  They pump people up and generate lots of emotion by telling them what they want to hear.

However, what we want to hear is usually the opposite of what we believe.  So their motivation wears off quickly; our established beliefs usually win in the end.

 

Reward and Punishment

As we let go, we’re all a lot like my oldest child, who was imprisoned in the educational system for six years before I set him free with unschooling.  He’d already become institutionalized.  He was accustomed to outer direction and rewards.  I asked him to look inside for his true desires. He had no fucking clue how to do that.  He begged me to tell him what to do, but I didn’t.  Eventually, his desires for outer motivation, direction, reward, and punishment died since he stopped feeding them.  He was left with inner motivation after about two years of tears.

Inner motivation is different from outer motivation.  The True Self knows the future, without going to psychics.  It’s not going to learn cursive writing unless it plans to be a calligrapher or old fashioned letter writer, but it will learn texting or typing.

The True Self hates spoon-feeding and memorization.  It wants to understand and experience everything.  But most schools ruin that innate desire.  Children learn to walk with very little assistance. They absorb the understanding from someone who already knows how to walk; then they figure it out.  They don’t read “Walking for Dummies.”

When my children wanted to learn something new, I’d point them toward the inventors and innovators in their field of interest — people who found their own wisdom.  I wanted them to trust their own ideas and to see that true desires always seem crazy to others because they’re not their desires.

Most people memorize and copy what others have discovered.  There’s no life force in that.  Beliefs, traditions, stories, knowledge, and rituals get passed down from generation to generation.  It’s old and dull.  In the beginning, such information was minimal and useful — like how to make fire.  Now we pass down useless knowledge, political persuasions, and antiquated religious ideas.

It’s habitual.  In ancient times, dead ancestors were labeled Gods.  Few people in the past have questioned their ancestral teachings.  People got used to being told things that felt bad or sounded illogical.   Sacrificing our desires for the sake of keeping the family and collective illusions alive became normal.  We stopped discriminating when we heard something from an elder, teacher, or expert.  After awhile, we’d believe anything.

 

Creation

To understand true motivation, we must understand the creation process. Creation starts in our mind as an original idea.  We think about the idea, and it grows.  Eventually, we desire to share our idea because sharing gives it life.  Then we’re inspired to action. The whole process is organic and enjoyable if no beliefs get in the way.  But invariably beliefs do get in the way, and we lose our motivation unless we let those beliefs go.

IMG_0021

If our desire is true, we’ll be inspired toward the next step and the next step; but we might not know the final destination.  We might not have support from our mother or friends, but we’ll find support in the form of validation, clarity, or insight.

Roles disappear.  No one can impose their beliefs on us if we know the difference between the truth and a belief.  The world is a mess because people think their beliefs are true.  Then they spew their beliefs on others because they think everyone needs their truth.  We already share the truth; we’re born with it.  Beliefs must remain temporary and personal.  They support, rather than dominate, creativity.

 

Action

The false self is action driven toward rigidly-defined goals. It seeks rewards and avoids punishment.  It avoids the creative process because it’s focused on end results and approval. The True Self’s ideas often look risky to the false self.  Beliefs about insecurity arise along with a lot of emotion.  If we don’t let those beliefs go, we’ll find our inspiration too difficult to follow.

The key to living from our True Self is to focus on our own mind.  The false mind is always  in other people’s business.  It believes that it gains status by mentally or physically pushing others down below it with it’s knowledge and conviction.  It fears others stealing it’s ideas; it’s competitive.  The false self judges, debates, and takes sides.  I know these things look normal; but normal people are deep in the illusion.

We must get to the place where we’re always watching our mind, discriminating, and letting go.  Eventually, it becomes automatic.  Our false self is blindly obedient.  It will be obedient to others unless we retrain it to be obedient to our True Self.

Yea, when we live this way, we’ll look lazy, unmotivated, or too happy.  Others will think we’re playing too much.  That’s their problem.  Finding our True Self and expressing it is what we all really want.  It’s finding the kingdom of heaven and eating from the Tree of Life again.

Being Truly Good by Eliminating Good and Evil

Good vs. Good and Evil

By Cathy Eck

 

Illusion Confusion

Good and evil rests at the core of the illusion.  Often it takes on a different form, like positive and negative; but ultimately, judging another as negative means that we’re seeing negativity as evil.  Good and evil was the way humans gave God an opponent to battle.  God originally represented our perfect True Self; therefore, the opponent of God is our OWN false self projected out into the world.  The final battle isn’t in the outer world.  It’s in our mind.  It’s initiation.

The confusion around good and evil causes so many problems.  People genuinely want to be good.  They really do.  There’s a reason for that; they were born good, and some part of their mind remembers their True Self.  We arrive with no opponent.  Good’s opposite arises when we accept another person’s notion of good — their rules or morals.  Rules tell us how to be good according to an outer system.  Rules deny the innate goodness of people.  That’s why most of my readers hate them.  Once we accept that being good is following outer rules even if they sound like the truth, we also now hold within the possibility of evil or badness if we disobey those outer rules.

We also have experts giving us rules for how to be healthy, how to be spiritual, how to be social, and how to be successful.  The result is that health, spirituality, social acceptance, and success have gotten harder — not easier.  We live in a bubble of experts determined to keep our natural wisdom and truth under wraps.  And often our truth is screaming in our mind, but we feel paralyzed if we try to speak it.  We’re so well trained to look outside for answers.

 

Fear of Judgment

When I first saw the illusion within myself, I felt like a backed-up sewage system.  I was no longer passing on my beliefs to others because I knew they were false.  But others didn’t stop demanding my obedience to their beliefs and rules.  This created a long and grueling awkward phase.  I couldn’t figure out how to escape this prison.

I could no longer obey their rules because I knew were false and limiting.  But disobedience resulted in judgment.  I hated being judged by those who still thought their rules were valid and good.  My discrimination felt worthless in a world where no one else was discriminating.  In fact, it seemed that my discrimination just got me into trouble with nearly everyone.

As we move toward freedom, we meet the same or similar experiences and feel the same emotions we felt and did not let go earlier in life.  We are slowly releasing beliefs.  The illusion shrinks each time we succeed in letting go until nothing is left.

Our fear of judgment probably came from the ancient act of cursing.  In earlier times, people believed that another person’s words or evil eye could take them down.  We all have a deep fear of other humans within us, especially if they are envious or angry.  The winners of the illusion play on this.  When we’re afraid, we’re easily controlled.

Many people adopt another belief like, “I don’t care what they think of me.”  Some work on their reputation and create a great looking mask.  Signs and symbols came out of the fear of expression, not truth.  We all have fear of beliefs and believers, which ultimately results from the foundation belief that the truth is less powerful than a belief system.  We think our love and truth is not enough in this world to keep us safe.  But if you let go enough, you’ll see that’s not true.

This all got worse with the positive thinking movement.  People said that words had power; and that’s true.  But most people’s words are not empowering; this only resurrected our fear of people, especially believers.

 

Psychological Reversal Again

The issue always comes back to the basic psychological reversal around emotions.  When people are sucked into the illusion, they think that something that feels bad IS true.  In the illusion, war, disease, poverty, and evil are all considered true and unavoidable — yet they all feel horrible.

When a resident of the illusion judges us, and it does feel bad to them, they don’t reject the thought; they act on it.  They want us to change, and often we do.  If we can’t beat them, we’ll join them.

I first came to understand this with my own children.  I’d notice something in them that I didn’t like — it looked very real AND I felt emotion.  If I mentioned it to them, they had no clue what I was talking about.  So I’d take responsibility and just let it go.  After awhile, I realized that I was seeing my own fears projected on them.  I let go from the masculine role until the problem I saw disappeared — it always did.  I did not make them responsible for my emotions.  Then I could see their perfection.

This is the sticking point of the illusion that traps us all.  Others think we’re causing their emotions with our disobedience.  They try to get their emotions to stop by changing their projection.  It doesn’t work EVER!  The projection isn’t the cause.

Now I understand what people were doing to me.  Being our True Self forces other people’s beliefs to surface; when this happens the false self goes into blame mode.  I used the feminine method of letting go in myself until I realized that they’re false thinking has no power to harm me.  If I stay in truth, and don’t judge them back, they back off.  In truth, beliefs only affect believers.  But rebelling against believers gets us stuck in their illusion.

Eventually, the concept of good and evil dies a natural death.  There’s no apocalypse, no buildings collapse — nothing physical needs to change.  The illusion was just a perspective.  Good and evil disappear; only true good remains as it was in the beginning.

 

 

 

The Host Parasite Relationship

Host Parasite relationship

By Cathy Eck

 

The Host

I never thought much about the notion of hosting until visiting Ecuador for a few months. I considered the woman who owned the home I stayed in to be my host.  Ironically, I started having problems with my internet provider during that time; of course, they were my “hosting” company.  The odd thing was that my hosting company was perfect until I went to Ecuador.  Clearly an old belief was coming up for releasing.

I decided to review my memories around hosting in general.  Many memories surfaced, and all were the same situation with different people.   I’d meet someone in my home or a neutral place, and we’d get along great.  Then they’d invite me to their home where they were the host.  Now I couldn’t stand them.  I felt as if they gave me food and wine in exchange for the whining that I would endure until I could politely escape their house of horrors.  One of these people even said to me, “Now you’re on my turf.”

The host role is a masculine role.  The true masculine host gives unconditionally.  The false masculine host looks like it gives when it actually takes like a parasite; it gives conditionally.

 

Host and Parasite

The word host has an opposite or a complement, depending on how you look at it — parasite.  Wikipedia says, “The host and parasite exert reciprocal selective pressures on each other, which may lead to rapid reciprocal adaptation.”

Humans shouldn’t be adapting to each other’s false selves.  Sadly, most relationships have a fragile quality to them.  Everyone behaves like tightrope walkers focused on holding the delicate balance.  People adapt to the most fragile ones; and everyone is secretly miserable.

A whining host behaves like a parasite, sucking the life out of its guests.  As a false masculine, they establishes the tone of the experience for everyone.  The false masculine commands the power and control of the masculine role while also receiving the benefits that belong to the feminine role.  Consequently, people seek the spotlight in the home or the stage.  They get the power, and they get the attention and/or money too.  They often label that win-win.  Those of us in the feminine role label it lose-lose.  We have no power; and we receive things we don’t want.

My internet hosting company pretended to serve me.  But they sent me crap that shut down my computer and websites.  I felt that I had to protect myself from my own host.  Ah, I was now seeing the pattern.  I felt the same way when visiting these hosts — like I needed to protect myself.  Since I’m not a fan of wrapping myself in white light, I wanted to find out how I ended up in this situation over and over.

Power in the illusion requires getting others to submit to or follow the leader’s beliefs so they can get what they want.  If you look at royalty, they give nothing; they have all the power, and boy do they receive.

Both of my hosts wanted me to listen to their self-inflicted problems and feel sorry for them.  I was supposed to marinate in their crap and not hold them responsible.  I had to pretend the cause of their problem was a mystery.  I had to pretend that they were a victim.  As a good guest, I was supposed to follow this social norm.  It was time to let that go.  I’d had enough.

 

The Escape

We generally feel powerless in the feminine role.  We’ve been trained that we can’t or shouldn’t get the masculine host to change.  But I’ve discovered that when I completely let go of my feminine role in any drama (including my emotions), the scene does change.  When I let go of my feminine role in my relationship with the host, I moved beyond roles (or into a True Masculine place from their point of view).  Now I only had to make sure that I didn’t judge or label them.  I had to make sure that I was speaking truthfully, not grabbing the stage.  Frequently, the host would relax; and our conversation became light, creative, and fun.  They became a proper host.

If they just wanted power and control over me (or still thought they did), they’d try to see me as the problem — a parasite.  They wanted their beliefs or drama validated.  They were now feeling the emotions that they were previously projecting out by whining.  The angst was where it belonged, with the whiner (parasite pretending to be a gracious host).

I’d often get trapped at this point because they thought that I was causing their emotions.  If I didn’t say anything, they’d often say, “Are you doing something to me?”  Often I’d doubt myself.  Was I the cause?  We live in a strange world where we believe we can say horrible things without paying a price.  And when held accountable, people blame the listener or questioner for the emotion they feel.

When I encounter new belief patterns, I go back into my memory and replay old situations with my new understanding.  I see the memory as it was; but this time, I also let go.  I don’t take in what the other people said; I see their beliefs as just beliefs — powerless, untrue, and certainly not who they are.  I watch as the situation changes in my mind.  It has to.  Of  course, it’s perfect in my mental workshop; but my repaired memories become my new history.  This sets the tone for my future real life exchanges.  Yes, we can change the past.

Eventually, in my mental workshop, I saw that the human opposite of host wasn’t parasite; it was guest.  The host now unconditionally gave; and I, the guest, joyously received.  Ironically, once I did this inner work, my Ecuadorian host fixed up my room.  She started to give to me in many ways.  And my internet hosting company took responsibility and fixed their problem.

Living the Masculine and Feminine Roles in Relationships

Earth as a mirror of our mind

By Cathy Eck

 

Getting Right Inside

I usually discuss the masculine and feminine related to roles; but the masculine and feminine are actually aspects of our own mind.  The correct inner relationship manifests correct outer relationships.  However, most people live as if the outer world and relationships create their thoughts.  They live life backwards.

In order to let go, we must move our attention inside of our mind.  We must take our focus off the belief-generated illusion and other people; we become inner directed.  Don’t confuse this with introversion.  Inner directed means our attention is on our OWN mind, not other people’s minds.  It means constant discrimination.

Whether we’re male or female, we came hard-wired with a masculine and feminine mind aspect — once called God and Goddess within  (True Self).  Living as a True Self is only possible when we let go of everything false from our minds.  We’re left with only true.  We now create in the physical world using only first-cause thinking.

When we’re thinking true thoughts, our inner masculine and inner feminine harmonize as one.  Our mind is unified (top of the triangle).  These are our most creative moments.  Our inner God now loves unconditionally and thinks only the truth or first-cause thoughts; hence our inner Goddess is creative and wise.  Our life works.

 

Inner Relationships Create Outer Relationships

Jesus said (paraphrasing), “Don’t do shit until you find the kingdom of heaven within.”  That was damn good advice.  If our inner masculine mind is a giant mass of beliefs and knowledge, our inner feminine mind will be emotional and non-creative.  What’s inside our mind creates what’s outside of us if we hold a masculine role.  When we don’t hold a masculine role, then we’re lowly cast members in the stories of the people who hold the masculine roles.

The true masculine leader was modeled after the sun.  The sun gives light and warmth unconditionally.  It doesn’t check to see if we’re worthy of it’s gift or ask for something in return.  Likewise, the masculine sexual organ gives.  Thus the masculine role was considered a giving/assertive role.

The feminine role was modeled after the moon or earth to reflect or absorb.  The sun, moon, and earth were metaphors for the mentally oriented masculine and feminine.  We assume that the sun sends pure light; but humans in the false masculine role send fluorescent (fake) light.

If the masculine mind or leader is like the sun (true) and loves the feminine unconditionally, the feminine reflects that unconditional love back like the full moon, or the feminine earth absorbs the sun’s rays and creates life.  However, if the false masculine mind or leader projects judgment, criticism, or discipline on the feminine, the feminine reacts unnaturally with emotion, rebellion, problems, or disease.

The True Masculine lets go of any thought that causes emotion or limits the feminine (not win-win).  But the false masculine doesn’t let go.  It thinks its beliefs are right and true.  It projects the unwanted part of it’s divided (second-cause) thinking on to its feminine using blame.  It believes that it can think false and get true.  That’s ridiculous, but that’s what it believes; it calls it discipline.

If we all lived as True Selves, creating would be cooperative with two or more whole people creating more than the sum of the equal parts.  A common goal or desire would unite people — not their beliefs.  The leader would hold the vision for the group — not impose beliefs or rules on them.

 

Reality of Relationships

The True masculine role is mentally oriented; its pure mind never gets tired of giving.  What effort does it take to think truth or love unconditionally?

The false masculine, however, is physically oriented; a false masculine mind says to physically give, sacrifice, or serve.  The false masculine leader (or God/Lord) gives discipline, rules, and beliefs.  It gives conditional love (rewards) and punishment.

Thinking false thoughts is exhausting.  But the false masculine is cunning.  It makes the rules and convinces others to do it’s hard work with lies while it receives the benefits, power, and credit.  Rules are false; they shouldn’t be obeyed.  But we’ve been psychologically reversed to obey.

A powerful false masculine leader (like royalty or a billionaire) feels balanced.  But, they’re not.  They’re living the beneficial side of both roles.  They have no compassion for their projection — the people living the shitty side of both roles who have no power and no rewards.  Thus the successful false masculine leader often does a little charity work or service to mask their projection and look generous.

False masculine leaders have no reason to change their mind, so we have to transform ours.  When we let go of their beliefs/rules in our mind even if they’ve created our reality in the past, we move into the True Masculine role naturally.  The true leader is the person with the purist mind in any situation.  They have more power than the balanced false masculine; they can make everything right.

In initiation, we don’t fight for the masculine role or win it by education, expertise, or knowledge.  We simply let go of all of our beliefs.  We let go of allowing others to project or impose their beliefs on us.  We let go of our judgments of others.  Our mind becomes clear and pure.  Then we rise naturally to the true masculine role.  It’s so subtle that we hardly even know we’ve done it.

In initiation, this was called becoming the Christ or the Son of God.  In religion, it’s called impossible.  Religion worships the false masculine; the false masculine always has an enemy or opposite like Satan.  The higher the false masculine rises in the system, the more it’s attacked by Satan.  However, when the True Masculine takes the lead, the false masculine loses its false power; it retreats or submits because it’s finally feeling its own emotions.  It’s pulled inward.  Its lies no longer work.  The war is over.