Help! I Can’t Find the F***ing Causal Belief

Beliefs can't find the cause

By Cathy Eck


Not a day goes by that I don’t hear, “Help Cathy, I can’t find my fucking belief.  I know it’s there because my life sucks or my body is screaming in pain.  But I can’t find the belief.”  There are many reasons why this happens.  Shit, I sometimes say it to myself.  Here are some of the most obvious and common reasons and fixes:


1)  The belief is hiding under what I call a “protector” belief.  Our false mind wants to live forever; it fears death and exposure.  When the protector is on duty, our mind is generating thoughts like:  “I can’t find the belief.”  “This is too hard.”  “I can’t do this.”  Those are protector beliefs that guard the causal belief.  Our false mind is trying to get us to stop letting go.  If we let go of these distracting protective beliefs, the causal belief often can be seen.

2)  The belief looks like it’s absolutely true.  It could be a belief that we’ve had forever.  It might be a collective belief that we know nearly everyone else believes.  It might be a belief that has created in our reality many times.  Remember, our reality up until this second was created by that causal belief.  If we let it go completely, our reality will change.  It has to.  An example of such a belief is, “Dad will never change.” Yes, that has been true until now, but it’s a belief.  Dad does have a True Self; and if we connect with that True Self, he can change.  These beliefs tend to feel like walls that we can’t get around until we go through them.

3)  We can’t bear to feel anymore emotion, so we keep distracting ourself.   Beliefs generate emotion.  Long standing beliefs are laced with lots of emotion.  Our false mind will try to tell us that the emotion means the belief is true; it’s lying.  That’s its job.  Sometimes, we just have to face the belief and all that emotion with courage.  We have to outlast it.  We’re becoming masters of our minds.  It isn’t the easiest thing we’ve ever done.   It can be like a war; and we need to win every battle.

4)  We’re still feminine to the person who inserted the belief into our mind.  We have physical symptoms, and we can hear the doctor’s voice saying the diagnosis.  We feel emotion when we hear his/her words, but we still view the doctor as powerful and knowing.  We fear going to hell, and we know it’s false; but we still view our mother or the priest as our authority.  To be free, we must have no masters other than our True Self.  This is about letting go of false gods.  Our True Self always has an answer and always knows what’s right for us.  But if we’re listening to others, we won’t hear it.  Often we hear religious voices saying listen to God.  Our True Self is God.  The voices we hear in our mind that sound like mom, dad, and the priest/preacher are false gods.

5)  We’ve got a conditioned response that masks the belief.  For example, we have a saying that we use to sooth ourself like, “Everything happens for a reason.”  “God has a plan.”  Or we do something conditioned like go for a run or kneel and pray.  Our conditioned responses show us what we believe.  We do them to ease the emotion (fix the effect) that the active belief is spewing.  Get rid of the belief, and we no longer need to fix the effect.

6)  We want to keep the belief.  Often our belief has a payoff.  We want to get rid of the pain, but we get a lot of attention for it.  We don’t like drama, but it’s how we relate to our friends; and we want to star on a reality television show.  I’ve worked with actors who believe they need their past emotions to act; they don’t, but try to tell them that.  We can’t hold on and let go at the same time.  Sometimes freedom is simply a choice.

7)  We feel no emotion when thinking an unwanted thought.  We’ve hit a psychological reversal.  So switch directions.  Think the opposite.  For example, you keep thinking, “I don’t make enough money.”  There’s no emotion.  It just feels like harsh reality.  So switch to the positive side of it.  “I make all the money I need.”  Ah, the emotion comes pouring out saying, “Good try.  That was a false line if I ever heard one.”  Many of us are painfully honest people.  We speak about reality too much.  My advice on that is to talk less, let go more.  The reality will shift; then you can talk again.

8)  We’re in other people’s minds.  We’re looking at what another said or did and wondering about their thinking when what matters is our thinking.  A man cuts us off in traffic.  We wonder why he did that?  That keeps us from watching our own mind.  We don’t notice that we have fear of bad drivers or judge angry people because our energy and attention is devoted to the driver’s mind.  Bring your attention back to your thinking.  Western meditation is great for this.  Their thinking is their own problem.

9)  We’re reasoning.  We don’t need a reason for why something happened.  What we need is the causal belief.  If  we’re reasoning, we’re too much in our logical false masculine mind.  If we drop into feeling, and just witness our emotions while listening to our thoughts, we’ll find the causal belief in our mind, which is the only reason we need.


The biggest trap is looking at what normal people do and thinking we can do that too and get free.  Most people, regardless of what they say they want, are on the express train to hell.  We have to remember that fitting in means riding the hell-bound train.  Freedom means getting off at the next stop.



6 thoughts on “Help! I Can’t Find the F***ing Causal Belief

  1. Ashley says:


    This brought up a question for me. You’ve said when we feel no emotion when thinking an unwanted thought, we could be psychologically reversed…

    But what if you don’t feel much emotion with the opposite either? Sidebar: I do remember you saying one time that physical symptoms themselves could be the emotion.

    Maybe my question is more around the meaning of the word “emotion.” Does every emotional response to a large belief have to be strong (I’m thinking crying, stomach tightening, intense anger etc) Or could it be much quieter?

    Like, a simple feeling of: “Hmm, I don’t like that. I don’t want that. It’s annoying.”

    Recently, I took myself back to a memory of receiving some upsetting test results. I could see myself seething with anger, crying etc. And I could recognize that the strong emotional reaction was because my guidance system was saying, “NOT TRUE. Let it go.”

    But I did’t feel emotional as I remembered this. It felt like remembering a dream from long ago.

    • Cathy says:

      Hi Ashley.
      Your question is complex, but let me break it up. Emotions can be at different levels. In my experience, something really scary has a lot of emotion or even pain. A long standing belief has more emotion or pain. If it doesn’t feel real or true then you don’t believe it. There will always be beliefs in the world. If we don’t believe them, we won’t feel any emotion. They won’t be in our experience.

      However, let’s look at an example. A Christian is talking about the end of the world and they believe it will happen but they are smiling because they see themselves as exempt. They project the fear out on to nonbelievers. They would feel all that fear if they realized tomorrow that they aren’t exempt. The exemption reverses their emotions so they can smile while thinking of dying. That’s an example of a strong psych reversal. There should be emotion, but there isn’t. So it is good to see if you think you are exempt but others could be harmed. If you do, then you still believe it. A belief is gone when it is false for everyone in your mind. Their mind is their problem. Hope that helps. Love Cathy

      • Ashley says:

        Bahaha Had to laugh when you said my question was complex. I thought — Of course, it is!

        Thank you for your response. I think what’s made this more difficult for me to wrap my head around is my past experience with OCD.

        At first, an obsession would generate profound fear. That’s what triggered the compulsion… But after a while, I didn’t take the thoughts so seriously. I had survived x amount of time without said thought happening in my reality.

        At that point, I didn’t even talk back to it and say You’re not me, you’re OCD anymore. I treated it like a mosquito and kept doing what I was doing in that moment.

        Eventually, from what seemed to be my lack of attention, the obsessive thought stopped.

        Recently, I’ve been experimenting with letting go of some big collective beliefs. I will have a moment sometimes where I feel clear afterward. But I’ve noticed the thought increasing in frequency.

        And, much like when I had OCD, I’m feeling less emotion around them. I was thinking I was just numbing out by default, but now I’m thinking I’m trying too hard to let go!!! And the beliefs would go more easily if I treated them like the mosquito.

        Like I’ve already acknowledged they aren’t true, so I don’t need to try to push them out. It’s almost like there’s the thought — Oh, I can’t think that thought again or I believe it. So, of course I think it.

        Not sure if this makes sense — just thinking aloud here. Don’t feel obligated to reply.

        Another thought: OCD is often treated with a CBT technique called flooding. You basically flood your mind with the thought until you get bored with it and realize it’s not true.

        The challenging part with letting go of beliefs that are largely seen as true is that you don’t have reassurance on your side. Almost everyone thought my OCD thoughts were absurd — that made it easier to let them go.

        • Cathy says:

          Hi Ashley,
          Just one thing that might help.
          You wrote, “At first, an obsession would generate profound fear. That’s what triggered the compulsion…” That fear or emotion was saying to you, “This thought is not true, let it go.” But you believed the thought as we all do because we aren’t taught that emotions means lie. So if you just get in touch with that emotion even in hindsight by replaying the old OCD moments in your mind as memories a few times, and noticing the correct response, you might find that letting go goes easier.

          With collective beliefs, they are persistent. They love to come back and try to get us again. But once you really let them go, they change in quality. We really let them go when we just know, not believe, they are false. You can’t mistake that feeling of knowing; it is so calm and clear. They now seem silly or you just don’t ever notice them at all again. Of course, if we don’t notice them, we forget we ever had them. So we keep working on what we do notice until we are just happy, quiet beings. But while you are working on a collective belief, it will seem like the whole world will want to tell you that the belief is true. Keeps the game interesting, I guess. Love, cAthy

  2. Karen says:

    Ok, Cathy, I’ll man up. I frequently think or say “Everything happens for a reason”. Could the hindrance to letting go be based on the point of view of how you interpret that statement? You might use it in the same context as”It is what it is”, meaning you turn your power over to something outside of yourself. Or, “Everything happens for a reason” could be interpreted as cause and effect. So my question, Is cause and effect a belief? If it is a belief, what would happen if we let go?

    #2 was great in thinking about beliefs around change. I came to realize that I don’t have a belief that Danny can’t change but a fear that he really just might! I feared for my freedom. But if he really changed and we connected at the true self then none of those fears would be realized. Bravo!

    • Cathy says:

      Hi Karen, Yes, you man up!!!
      Yes “everything happens for a reason” implies cause and effect. But most people do associate a particular cause with it such as God. Really the cause is someone’s belief — either our own or someone who is superior to us in authority. The key is to ask yourself, “So what is that reason that everything happens for?” Then you’ll find the causal belief that is hiding in the bushes. Cause and effect is just how it works in the mental-physical world. We have a thought (cause) and we get an effect (physical). You won’t be able to let that go. The True Self likes it that way. When we are free, our own mind, our own True Self is the cause. And everything is perfect and beautiful. I call that consolidation; where we get that nothing outside of us has more power than we do. We are the writer of our story.

      Your insight on Danny is perfect. Bravo! Love, Cathy

Comments are closed.