No Longer a Victim: Escaping Victimhood Forever (Part I)

Fish in a Bowl -- victim

By Cathy Eck

 

The hardest thing for people to let go is victimhood.  Victims appear stuck in feminine roles.  Victims always look outward for perpetrators instead of inward to the real cause.  When I convince a victim to let go of the cause within their own mind, their outer perpetrator loses power.  The perpetrator had power because they believed the perpetrator’s beliefs.

 

Reality

We all begin life in a feminine role.  We lack authority and power.  A baby requires someone in a masculine role to care for them.  Consequently, we all associate the feminine role with the powerlessness of childhood.  Our bodies mature, but our minds revert to childhood whenever we’re cast into feminine roles.  We believe we’re powerless — unable to get what we need or want.  We blame the person we think should fulfill our desire, instead of the person who gave us our beliefs.  The illusion survives by making sure victims don’t find or blame the true cause of their victimhood.  In fact, the victim usually  thinks their perpetrator is good or God.

Victims accept false feminine roles in order to look good by flawed standards.   The president declares war on his own enemies and enjoys drinking Dom Perignon while martyrs fight his battles because they believe sacrifice is good.  Billionaires can hire underpaid slaves to do their work because slaves believe hard work is virtuous.  Clergy pass the donation basket and minions drop their last dollar for words that aren’t worth two cents because they believe the Bible is the word of God.  Victims keep illusory machines running; they’re like moths to a flame.  They’re taught that good people sacrifice, work hard, and give when they have nothing to give.  They’re so blindly obedient that they can’t see the flame that’s burning them alive.

 

Win-Lose

I began to question the way life works when I worked for one of the biggest consulting firms in the world in my twenties.  If you’ve seen the movie, “The Wolf of Wall Street,” it’s no exaggeration.  I saw all of that and more.  The wolves see life as a win-lose game; they’re simply good players.  In their mind, if you suck at the game of life, it isn’t their fault.  They view victims as poor losers who give up too easily.  Wolves lie because it works.  They hire cheap labor because people take the jobs. 

During this same time period, I married into a nice Italian Catholic family of sheep.  I lived the life of working and partying all week with the wolves; then I’d visit family and eat communion wafers, hear the same old shit stories over and over again, and watch the same boring rituals and traditions.  They saw life through a lens of good and evil.  They were good and moral.  They saw the wolves I worked for as evil and immoral.   

couldn’t reconcile these two sides of my life.  I didn’t want either.   The wolves partied too much and were never satisfied.   They thought money would buy them freedom and joy, and it never did.  I wanted to be good, but I didn’t want the boredom, misery, and victimhood of sheep.  Clearly, neither had the truth.

 

The Key

Wolves simply do what works in the win-lose illusion.  The wolves respected me because I’d call them on their game — they couldn’t trick me.  Wolves don’t feel immoral anymore than an athlete feels immoral when they win.  They don’t create sheep.  They simply give sheep what they’re asking for — a perpetrator.  

On the other hand, sheep work hard to create more sheep by imposing their beliefs on others, especially children.  They tell others that they’re bad when they’re being their True Self or when they succeed.  They cause people to doubt and ignore their emotions.  They demand blind obedience and won’t answer why questions.  Sheep have power tools — guilt, shame, blame, and fear.  

Sheep told me that I needed to learn to be happy while I suffered.  I couldn’t do that.  Once I got truly happy, the problem causing the suffering vanished.  They were clearly doing something unnatural and making it right, but they said I was a failure at suffering.  WTF?  Their perspective is like Pin the Tail on the Donkey.  They blindfold you, spin you around until you’re dizzy, and then wonder why you can’t find the donkey’s ass.  They eventually break your spirit.  Only then will they say you’re good.  

 

Win-Win

I left the wolves’ den to start my own business, and I found my sweet spot.  If I dealt in win-win terms and worked on my own mind instead of using my will and tricking and manipulating the sheep, I could achieve success without harming others.  I didn’t need to be a wolf.  I shared this with my fellow wolves, and they all joined me.  They were only tricking sheep because they thought they had to.

The positive thinking and new thought movements were attempts by ex-wolves to enlighten sheep.  They revealed the rules of the win-lose game to make things fair.  They put out books like “Think and Grow Rich.”  But giving the sheep the rules of the win-lose game didn’t change anything.  Sheep are stuck in the good and evil game.  They don’t want wolves to go away, they need someone to view as evil.  So many of the wolves said, “Fuck you.  You want wolf.  I’ll show you fucking wolf.”

The wolves had extended the olive branch.  They proved that sheep aren’t victims of wolves in wolves clothing  — we’re born with emotional lie detector systems.  The sheep are victims of wolves in sheep’s clothing — religious and spiritual wolves masked as sheep (masculine roles behaving as if they’re feminine) who teach sheep to turn off their emotional lie detection, blindly obey authority, and ignore their True Self.   Without this psychological reversal, wolves would be powerless.   Sadly, sheep follow shepherds who feed them to the wolves, and the sheep glorify the shepherds for doing it.  .

To be continued…