The Four Levels of Relationships

relationships

By Cathy Eck

 

Level Confusion in Relationships

In many of my posts, I talk about the nemesis of initiation — level confusion.  Relationships are highly complicated by level confusion.  We view dysfunctional  relationships as normal or even good.  Unconditionally loving relationships are considered fantasy story material or boring.

The pyramid above is physically oriented.  Relationships at the bottom are much more noticeable because they create strong emotions and dangerous physical effects.  The top of the pyramid is barely visible because our bodies and minds are calm and the effects produced are pure, harmless, and lacking in drama.

 

Level 1:  Unconditionally Loving Relationships

This is where we begin our journey on earth — the True Self.  We love everyone; differences are celebrated and complementary.  No one harms another.  People are creative, joyous, and free.  Spirit, mind, and body are congruent.  This level is the goal of initiation — death of the false self; rebirth of the True Self.

When we look at the world through this spiritual or divine orientation, we focus on our own thinking and our own creating.  Our minds hold only true, undivided thoughts.  This level is perfect, but it would become boring if it was the only way we lived.  So we created level two.

 

Level 2:  Mental Relationships

In mental relationships, we create beliefs.  If we use our mind as designed, beliefs are personal or shared for purposeful co-creation.  When our creation is complete or the desired result is obtained, the beliefs were meant to be dropped.  We return to level one until we wish to create again.  This is called first-cause creation.  If we stay in first-cause creation, we remain a mental virgin — our mind is a pure, creative womb.  Our creations are win-win for everyone.  Life is joyous and free; we don’t experience problems.

However, if we create or borrow beliefs that separate us from others such as pretty versus ugly, rich versus poor, or Republican versus Democrat, we move into second-cause creation.  Second-cause beliefs contain an element of judgment, dividing us from the whole.  They’re always accompanied by emotion, which is the signal that what we’re thinking isn’t true and isn’t in our best interest.  When people learn to ignore their emotional signals, they hold on to beliefs as if they’re true.  They become half instead of whole.  They look to emotional relationships for completion, falling even further from their True Self.

 

Level 3:  Emotional Relationships

Most emotional relationships are labeled chemistry or romance.  But they also occur between people who are like-minded in beliefs (especially religious or political).  Beliefs cause us to feel alone and separate; emotional relationships seem to fix that separation.

Emotional relationships are usually held together by seemingly positive emotions such as romance, hope, excitement, and pride.  These are the most damaging emotions.  They pull us right into the illusion and hold us there.

All emotions are signals from our True Self that we’re creating with second-cause beliefs.  It’s as if we’re now running on limited battery power instead of unlimited electric current.  Consequently, emotional relationships last only because the fear of leaving outweighs the emotional pain of staying.  Death provides a welcome ending when our battery power runs out.

In emotional relationships, we feel connected when we’re with the one or ones who complete us.  Outsiders threaten our fragile beliefs and seeming connection.  Group power is false power that pretends to be real power.

Letting go of emotional relationships requires finding the causal belief that got us into the relationships.  We must move up to level two, find the second-cause belief, and let it go.  People often fear losing codependent emotional relationships and miss the opportunity to become whole or to experience higher level relationships.

Emotional relationships feel powerful because emotions create drama and the ups and downs of excitement.  Over time, emotions create disease and problems, which often unite us in yet another dysfunctional way.  Sadly, our creative power is diminished at this level.  Life eventually pulls us down into opposition.

 

Level 4:  Opposition in Relationships

The bottom level of the relationship pyramid is opposition.  It’s the foundation of the physical illusion.  People, who live completely within their false self, view this level as the truth.  Religion invented this world of opposites spiced with judgment — I’m good; you’re evil.  Business and gaming entered the picture — I win; you lose.  Moral and social behavior was defined — I’m right; you’re wrong.  Politics got involved — I dominate; you submit.

This level is the domain of fundamentalist religions and political division resulting in war, poverty, disease, and suffering of all types.  The only way to stay alive at this level is to create second-cause beliefs that place us above others, such as being part of a chosen group.  That takes a lot of effort to sustain because others will work hard to knock us off of our fragile pedestal.

Seeing level four as true is what causes people to have an apocalyptic view of life.  They see themselves as good; those who try to knock them off their pedestal of false superiority are labeled the enemy or evil.  Many try to resolve oppositional problems by looking for someone (like a savior) or something (bigger bomb) that neutralizes all their causal beliefs.

 

The Solution

True safety and real relationship comes from dropping all second-cause beliefs.  We must move out of our false selves and allow our True Selves to lead.

We must follow our emotions to unveil our second-cause beliefs.  We take responsibility for our beliefs, let them go, and ignore the creations and beliefs of others who are lost.  This is how we regain our creative power.

If we organized the above pyramid based on creative power instead of physical power, the levels would be reversed.  Unconditional love has the most creative power.  Opposition has almost none; it’s only about survival.

Unconditional love is pure creative energy.  When the initiate reached that level, they were said to create as Gods.  Earth became their heaven.