I Want Freedom BUT I Already Fixed That

Freedom from emotions

By Cathy Eck


People are becoming more and more aware of the illusion; they hide from it, vent about it, or feel like they’re stuck in a prison with no parole.  No wonder so many people are depressed.  Others fight the illusion or rebel against it, but they never win.  Why are we so afraid of this giant cartoon?

You see, if we’re bothered by another person’s illusion, it has taken up residence in our OWN mind.  Freedom is about destroying the beliefs in OUR mind that have cast us into roles in other people’s illusions.  We must realize that their illusion can’t affect us if we don’t believe it.  If we believe that we MUST fix another person or get them to see they’re wrong so we can be free, we still share their belief.  The more we let go, the more clear this becomes.


Fear Rules the Illusion

Letting go allows us to see that we’re all victims of the illusion; we’re not really victims of each other.  If we’re getting something we don’t want from another or from life, we believe that what we got is real or true; or we believe that the person who cast us in the feminine role has power over us.  Getting free requires using our emotions to go inside our mind and find our causal beliefs.

People want guns because they fear other people are bad and could harm them.  People join religions because they fear their soul was stained — they want a better afterlife or next life.  People adopt diets, exercise routines, or practices because they fear death, aging, weight problems, or illness.  People follow authority because they fear punishment.  People take jobs they hate because they fear being without money or believe they need the benefits.  Most of our doing is simply to counteract fear and paranoia.  It’s not creative.

Paranoia and fear make us vulnerable to clever marketing.  In fact, we can often see our beliefs by looking at what we’re tempted to buy.  We wouldn’t want to fix the problem if we didn’t still believe we had it.  You can be sure that the minute we fix one illusory fear, someone will find something else to scare the shit out of us  Then they sell us yet another product or service.  We win when we no longer believe we need anything from another — that’s freedom.

The True Self has no emotion because it holds no beliefs; the false self is filled with beliefs and emotions.  Emotions are the effect, not the cause.  So if we think we need a gun, we need to look at the beliefs causing our fear of other people.  If we think we need religion, we need to follow our fear of sin to the causal religious beliefs.  If we think we need our partner to spend more time with us, we must follow our emotion to our loneliness.  If we think we need a food or exercise regimen, we should follow our fear of illness or fat to find the causal beliefs that were probably learned from an expert.  As we let go, we’re relieving the experts, which have ruled our lives, of their duty.

Often we think that mental solutions fix the cause.  We’re attracted to spiritual teachers, mental techniques, and practices like positive thinking, visualization, meditation, yoga, Tai chi, EFT, new religions, hypnosis, or NLP because they seem to put new and improved beliefs in our mind or relieve our emotions.  Sometimes we grasp a moment of clear sight, which causes us to let go.  But that is rare and often not easily repeatable.  We eventually grow tired of these techniques too.  Now we’re ready to let go.

By the time that we realize this, we’re often exhausted.  We’ve tried so many things.  We have no desire to do much of anything; and that’s good.  We’re finally tired of fixing problems.   Fortunately, it doesn’t take physical energy to let go.  But it takes desire, persistence, and courage.  Then we see the horrible truth.  We meet all the things we thought we fixed because we didn’t fix the cause; we fixed the effects.  That’s a real “Oh FUCK!” moment.  It looks like we’re going backwards before we can go forward; this causes many people to quit letting go before they even get started unless they understand what’s going on.


Getting to Freedom

To get to freedom, we have to heighten our awareness of our own mental processing by witnessing our thinking.  We observe what we’re driven to do and constantly ask ourselves why we’re doing it.  We stop living on automatic.  We must get painfully honest with ourselves; and stop looking for others to fix our emotions and problems.  And we must stop fixing the emotions and problems of others.

“Why?” becomes our best friend.  Why am I feeling that I need to do this, be this, or want this?  Why do I think I need this product, practice, or person?  The answer points to the cause; and it won’t feel good.  But you now know that you were doing all that work or spending all that money only to fix a stupid belief that didn’t even feel good.

We have to realize that every time we fix the effect, we give the causal belief more power.   And that’s why we often feel so much emotion when we stop fixing the effects.  We’ve been covering that emotion with products, practices, or practitioners for a long time.  It’s like going cold turkey with an addiction.  Actually, the biggest addiction on this planet is fixing the effects of our beliefs to eliminate our emotional discomfort.  Nearly everyone has that addiction.   We thought we desired the thing that fixes the effect, but all those emotions were just begging us to remove the causal belief.  When we remove the false belief, the false desire disappears as well.  We won’t see that particular problem again.



The Flip Side of Winning Isn’t Losing

Charlie Sheen and Winning

As kids we’re not taught how to deal with success; we’re taught how to deal with failure. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. If at first you succeed, then what?               Charlie Sheen

By Cathy Eck


What is the Real Flip Side of Winning?

Charlie Sheen had a point even if he did take things to the extreme.  Humans are conditioned to believe that winning is everything and losing is a reason to try, try again or try harder.  We don’t want to be labeled a loser, but we are never a loser unless we lose sight of the real prize.

We often focus our eyes on a shallow or material prize that usually has a very important hidden meaning.  It is that hidden desire or fear that shows us where we need some mental healing.

Maybe we think that winning will cause us to be someone special or deserve greater things in life.  Winning might bring us money so we don’t have to struggle anymore.   Winning might open the door so we can express our talent or gift.  You see it isn’t the win we want, we want what appears to be missing underneath.  The irony is that we aren’t ever missing anything; what we want has simply been covered up by a belief — a belief that someone else gave us and isn’t even true.

It is actually our losses that expose our beliefs most often.  When we understand that, our loses can become even greater wins.


What is Rightfully Mine?

The big question that we are all really asking is:  What is rightfully mine?  Often we want something because it made someone else happy.  Our parents and friends push us into their perspective of happiness and convince us to follow a proper career or marry a proper partner.  But following what others feel is right for us, takes us down their path.  We may end up getting what is right for them and sadly have to bear the enormous pain of watching another get what is right for us.

It isn’t selfless to give up what is rightfully ours.  People who give up their desires can’t support others who do choose to follow their heart.  People who abandon their desires become jealous of other people’s success even if the person deserves it.  They lay guilt on those who succeed.  Often we believe them and start to question our motivation or desires until we are company for their misery.

Sometimes people think they want what we have.  To feel good, they have to mentally prove we don’t deserve our success.  Other times, they make our desire wrong saying it isn’t the right desire.  Maybe it isn’t right for them; but more often, they just don’t think they can achieve it.  

Life as an Individual Sport

When I can’t make sense of life in the present, I look to the schools of initiation to see what they thought about a particular subject.  They didn’t have rules or laws or even practices; they had a perspective that was very different from our perspective.  They saw life as an individual sport.  Competition, from their point of view, caused people to lose themselves.  Competition and games were part of the illusory world where pain, suffering, and problems existed.  Competition caused you to focus on the opponent instead of focusing on your True Self.

Just look at the US 2012 Presidential Election.  Each candidate is more focused on what the other plans to do, has done in the past (right or wrong), or whether they are telling the truth.  They are both losers because neither is focused on their own integrity, their own commitment, and their own love for the people of America.  Sadly, neither of them are Presidential material from ancient standards.

The initiates saw competing as a vehicle for self-improvement.  Winning or losing was irrelevant in their view of competition.  If you’ve ever played tennis or chess with a better player to improve your game, you understand this.  You want to learn from the other or push yourself harder, and you feel that you’ve won just by playing with them.

When life is viewed this way, you really can’t lose.  If you gained an insight into yourself while competing, you won.  If both people gained insights, the interaction was win-win.  The goal was about winning your True Self, and the prize was joy, unconditional love, peace, and freedom.  Material prizes were such a piddling little nothing compared to the real prizes.  The results of the game were mostly ignored.


When We Need to Lose

Often after letting go of our judgments, worries, and fears for a long time, we lose all desire to compete in the illusory world.  Some of us become anti-social or reclusive (I certainly did).  But when I really looked at my reclusive behavior and the why behind it, I realized that I didn’t want anyone to lose.  I so wanted win-win that win-lose seemed repulsive.  I didn’t realize that sometimes losing pushes us to at least change our direction, ideally losing causes us to let go of the beliefs that caused us to lose.

Today winning is often associated with willpower, being against the opponent, and hard work.  Losing is associated with failure.  That is 180 degrees from the truth.  Sadly, many win the big prizes and lose themselves.

What everyone really wants is winning without losing, joy without sadness, freedom without imprisonment, and peace without war or tolerance.  We can have those things, but we must find our True Self.  If we look at why we want to win, we can often find the answer.  Then we can work on letting go of whatever blocks the way to our True Self.  When we find our True Self, we enter the world of truth and win-win; losing is no longer possible.


Here is another article on why our True Self sometimes lets us struggle.

photo credit: 4rilla via photopin cc