By Cathy Eck
As an entrepreneur, I read lots of business books. When I finished one, I’d go to Barnes & Noble to get another. One night, I stopped at B&N to get my latest fix. I noticed a book on the display that said “Win-Win” on the cover. I didn’t buy the book or even look inside it. But I loved the sound of those words — win-win.
I bought another book and left the store. But I couldn’t get win-win out of my mind. I thought, “I’m going to start living my life that way. If something isn’t win-win, I won’t do it.” I didn’t realize that I’d just opened a gateway to compassion…one of the most important keys to initiation.
The next day, during a restroom break at work, I was washing my hands; and I dripped soap on the sink counter. Those soap droplets caught my attention. I wondered if just leaving them on the sink was win-win. After all, we had a maid. But then the soap would stay there looking messy until the maid came. I also sensed an attitude of superiority in me as if I was too important to clean. That didn’t feel win-win. How could I possibly be more important than the woman who cleaned this restroom? It really wasn’t win-win to pass the responsibility for my mess on to the maid even if it was technically her job.
Eventually, I pulled down some paper towel and cleaned up my mess. But I hadn’t just cleaned the counter. I’d also cleaned something in my mind. I realized that when I reached that win-win place of thinking over this stupid little thing, I felt a deep calmness that I’d not felt since childhood. It was way beyond anything I’d felt with meditation. Meditating quieted my mind; but I was letting go of my shallow false masculine perspective, which freed my mind.
Back at my desk, I picked up a sales contract. Suddenly it didn’t look win-win. I called the potential customer and offered to make changes in his favor. I wasn’t playing games anymore; I treated him the way I would want to be treated. Again, I felt that peace.
This experiment started with a physical focus — doing that which was win-win. But it shifted into something much bigger — letting go of any thought that wasn’t win-win. That, I’d learn, is the meaning of compassion. Compassion is what tames the false masculine.
About ten years later, people started to write books on the power of intention. But there was no compassion in their intention setting. They were thinking an intention before they did something like “Send me that which is for the highest good.” It sounded nice, but they were washing their hands of responsibility — letting the universe decide what’s good for them. Unfortunately, the universe doesn’t act as our fair and just concierge; we get what we believe. This allowed the person to look compassionate without being compassionate. Compassion doesn’t happen until we let go of beliefs. It purifies our mind when we let go of the false masculine’s judgmental win-lose, good-evil, or right-wrong thoughts.
Others set intentions like, “I intend to win this race,” or “I intend to lose twenty pounds this month.” They were willing the future into submission for their benefit — another talent of the false masculine.
My intention to live from win-win caused me to go deep into my mind and to question my own thinking. I was letting go before I even understood letting go. To really get to win-win on any subject, I had to consider everyone that might be affected by the situation — the true application of the Golden Rule. Letting go of the false masculine beliefs and judgments transformed my false physically-oriented perspective into the true, pure mental perspective of life. Of course, when my mind was right, top of the triangle with no opposite thoughts, my behavior followed. I couldn’t imagine harming another.
Later, I decided to do my Ph.D. Dissertation on the initiation story of Jesus, and I used this same technique. Unlike Christians, I didn’t want to copy Jesus’ actions; I wanted to understand, and find in myself, the mind of Jesus. I’d take a Bible quote that didn’t make sense such as, “The meek shall inherit the earth.” I started with the win-lose interpretations that I’d been taught: “You have to be submissive to get to heaven. You get rewarded for giving others what they want.” None of the thoughts that popped into my mind felt win-win. They didn’t produce that calmness or compassion. So I kept dropping every belief that arose and kept digging for the truth. You see, the truth wasn’t in some guru or in the ethers for channels to pick up; it was in my mind resting quietly below all of my false knowledge.
After letting go of many thoughts about this quote, I dropped into that now familiar place of win-win. Jesus was talking about the mental, not the physical. He was already in that compassionate place when he spoke. When we let go of our beliefs and knowledge, our mind becomes meek, quiet, and pure. We can’t imagine fighting or willing in order to get what we want. And yet, our meek mind is extraordinarily powerful because our mind is so clear and creative. We easily get whatever we focus our mind on — we inherit the earth.
I repeated this process for thousands of hours until I decoded the path of initiation from the story of Jesus. He was a compassionate dude; and it wasn’t because of what he did but because of how he thought. Then I saw it everywhere — initiation was embedded in many ancient myths and legends. You can’t see it until you get the right perspective. Real freedom, real peace, and real power are revealed when we exercise compassion and let go until our thinking becomes completely win-win for everyone. That’s how we bring heaven back to earth.