Manifesting Desires: An Alternative To New Year Goals and Resolutions

New Year's Resolutions

By Cathy Eck

 

It’s that time of year when people talk about their desires, resolutions, goals, and intentions for the next year.  Most of those goals will be abandoned before the leftovers from New Year’s Day dinner are gone. People tend to do what they’ve done before — even if it didn’t work.  They don’t know what else to do.  Their beliefs limit their mind so they can’t see what lies outside of their little box.

 

Desires

The process of manifesting desires is very different from the initiate’s perspective.  Initiates consider all desires to be worthwhile. Their goal is never the fulfillment of those desires, although that often happens, because our True Self can fulfill all desires with ease.  The initiate knows that desires create a catalyst for letting go.  Having desires exposes the beliefs that we need to let go by bringing them into our conscious awareness.   As we shed those beliefs, we either get our desires or we forget about them.  But either way, desires served our quest for freedom.

Most people use mental (affirmations, visualization, etc.) or physical actions to achieve desires.  Beliefs rise to the surface, and people obey them even if they don’t want to.  If they don’t obey their beliefs, they don’t fulfill their desires.  We admire people who can beat their beliefs into submission with willpower and hard work or leap over their beliefs with a single bound — usually they’re also good at projecting their unwanted beliefs on to others.  Getting desires is considered success; not getting them is failure.  The journey isn’t very pleasant.

As the New Year approaches, we view life as if we’re starting over.  We’re often more aware of our desires.  But the beliefs we had last year that caused us to fail are still there unless we’ve been letting go.  The initiate focuses on finding the beliefs in their mind that keep their desires from manifesting.  They don’t jump into action or use their will to fulfill desires.  They take action only if it’s inspired, joyous, and fun.  Otherwise, they keep letting go.

 

Beliefs

We find our beliefs by watching our mind as we lightly think about our desires; or we ask questions to expose beliefs.  Of course, when the answers (beliefs) arise, we must discriminate.  Often the answers we hear in our mind are widely believed, socially correct, or traditional.  They might sound like guidance or God talking.  They’re going to look true and real because we believed them before.  If our desires are long standing, we’re probably highly psychological reversed (meaning that we accept beliefs that feel bad as true).

Let’s look at a common example — dropping weight.  We have a desire to change our body weight.  We can even see ourselves at the perfect weight.  That’s all we have to do with our desire.  It’s recorded.

Now we have to find the beliefs that keep the weight from just falling off effortlessly doing activities or eating food we enjoy.  Let’s assume that the first belief to arise is, “I have to join a gym and work out.”  Let’s assume that thought arises with lots of emotion.  We don’t like working out.  The emotion is saying, “That thought isn’t the truth.”  A battle with our mind has begun.  We live in a reality where lots of people lose weight by working out for long hours.  There are zillions of programs and trainers.  Dr. Oz will tell you that you need to do this.  But none of that matters.  We’re looking for our truth. If a thought is accompanied by emotion, it’s not true for us.

Our false mind will try to force us to accept the widely-accepted status quo.  When we follow another person’s beliefs on any subject, we’re believing that we don’t have the answer to fulfilling our desires.   We need to let that belief go; it isn’t true.  But we usually don’t.  Instead, we accept more beliefs that we’re told are the right beliefs.  Eventually, we’ll get tired of this solution, usually after paying lots of money to borrow the expert’s beliefs.  We’ll see the stupidity of it.  In addition, their solution will lack staying power.  Their enthusiasm might be real; their solution might have been the right solution for them.  But that doesn’t mean it’s right for us.  What’s right for us will feel good.  We won’t have to will ourselves to do it.

People look outside to others for answers.  But the only answer that works permanently is the answer that lives in our True Self.  We find that by letting go of the beliefs that veil it.

So the gym thought feels horrible, and we let it go.  Now we think, “I have to find a diet.”  The normal person will go buying books, making diet food, and enrolling in programs.  But we’re an initiate; we notice the diet thought generates emotions.  So we let the thought and emotions go.

If we keep following our chain of beliefs, we’ll start to find the hidden causes.  We’ll find more and more beliefs about food, exercise, and body that have supported our weight.  We might find relationship beliefs or beliefs about career.  If weight has been an issue for much of our life, this won’t be a weekend job.  It’s a new way of life.  We’ll find more  beliefs arise every time we eat.  We’ll find beliefs arise if we sit down and do nothing.  We’ll find beliefs when we visit family and friends.  But now we’re on the right path.  We’ve become aware of the complex system of beliefs that exists within our mind.  And we’ll keep letting go for days, months, or years until we’re free.  Our desires have served their purpose.   Then one day, we’ll forget our desires ever existed because they’re manifesting.  We don’t need desires when we easily get everything we want and need.  And all that struggle in the past will be nothing but a waking dream that really was just an illusion.

 

When Letting Go Doesn’t Appear to Work

When Letting Go Doesn't appear to work

By Cathy Eck

 

Often, people fear that letting go isn’t working because they’re not getting physical results.  Letting go is all about creating a mental shift.  Physical changes are a bi-product of letting go, not the purpose of it.  Always keep score based on your mental state.  Does your mind feel more clear?  Are you more at peace?  Do you recognize that your emotions are helping you discriminate?

Related to this issue are questions like these.  “How does one know if they’ve let go?”  “How does letting go happen?”  “Help me, Cathy, I don’t know what to let go.”

 

Letting Go Always Works

If we have no beliefs, we can’t create a false experience.  Our problems, pain, and emotions remind us to let go; but they don’t often tell us what to let go.  Let me give you an example.

Someone has a disease that a medical doctor has labeled “incurable.”  They believe doctors cure disease.  They also have a belief that diseases are true and given to us by God as lessons or punishment.  Their mother thinks they’re bad because they’re gay.  They believe their mother is their authority.   So they think their disease is punishment for being gay.  This represents a complex of beliefs.  Their disease won’t leave until they let go of most of this complex.  If they hold on to any of these false beliefs, that belief can provide the platform for their disease to continue to thrive.

If we discriminate, we’ll feel emotion when we think any of the above statements.  Complexes can be very tricky.  Lots of subtext will arise as we let go of beliefs that we’ve considered true in the past.  We might hear voices that try to get us to feel guilt or shame for letting such things go.  We might fear loneliness if we make ourselves too different.  The voices might say that letting go isn’t working; it will try to get us to fix the effect of the problem or look for a rescuer.  It isn’t just the directly-obvious beliefs that cause our problems.  Consequently, I push people who want their life to change to let go of everything.

You can’t screw this up.  You can’t let go of the truth.

 

Did I Really Let Go?

If we really let go, we won’t think the belief again.  More important, we won’t be looking for an answer to our problem or someone to save us from it.  We also won’t be trying to keep the problem away with prayers, lucky incantations, or superstitions.  It can take a lot of work to get to the free perspective.  But when we completely let something go, we don’t have to do it ever again.

We’ll forget we ever had the problem.  It feels like we dreamed it.

You can’t fake letting go.  You either did it or you didn’t.  Lots of teachers, gurus, politicians, and speakers appear to be very spiritual, unemotional, and free; but we only see them in the masculine role.  They’re always on stage or in the pulpit.  We look up to these people, which lifts them up to false heights.  Then we live in their shadow, and their shadow isn’t pretty.  We think there’s something wrong with us.

If one is playing a masculine role, they’re free of a belief when they no longer see it in themselves or those who are feminine to them.  If they’re a preacher who sees sinners, the sinner is still suppressed in them.  If they’re a teacher who has stupid or bad students, the judgment of stupidity or disobedience is within their mind.  The challenge of the masculine role is to never give beliefs to others or project beliefs on them.

However, if we’re playing a feminine role, we’ve submitted our creative authority to others who appear superior to us.  We must be careful that we don’t blindly believe these authorities.  In the feminine role, we’re constantly challenged by others who think they know what’s true for us.  The challenge of the feminine role is to feel, discriminate, and never blindly make another’s words our truth.

 

Roles Are Key

As you can see, roles are played in reverse in the illusion.  Those in masculine roles believe it’s their duty to tell others what to believe.  Parents, teachers, doctors, politicians, and clergy all tell others what to believe.  They think we don’t know the truth; we have to learn it.  Likewise, we’re taught to blindly believe authority, even when what they say feels bad.  We’re forced to respect people who don’t deserve respect.

These two psychological reversals are at the core of the whole illusion deception.  That deception causes all the suffering, poverty, pain, and disease on this planet.  None of it would exist if people did three things:

1) Didn’t believe anything another said that felt bad (feminine role).  They trusted their emotions over authority.

2) Never imposed or projected a belief on another (masculine role).

3)  Let go of all second-cause beliefs that they’ve accepted from others in the past.  Second cause beliefs contain judgment — good/evil, right/wrong, superior/inferior, etc.

That’s it.  Number three takes time.  Sadly, it isn’t done in a weekend workshop.  But we all have the ability to do it.  To let go of the illusion is the greatest service we can provide the planet and others.  It doesn’t even cost a thing.

It’s painful to see how many beliefs we’ve accepted.  Exiting the illusion is like finding our way out of a labyrinth; we must let go of what doesn’t work so we can find what does.  If we’re still clinging to our past practices and techniques that haven’t worked, we won’t find the exit.

Letting go, unlike other practices, has an end.  Letting beliefs go reveals our True Self.  If the process appears slow or ineffective, it’s because the false self still has too much power.  Be persistent; let go of whatever you can.  In time, you’ll be rewarded with the revelation of your True Self — pure freedom.

 

Slavery and Freeing Our Minds

Statue in Cuenca, Ecuador

By Cathy Eck

 

Traveling in the Feminine Role

I’m back home reflecting on my nearly three months in Ecuador.  When most people travel, they either go as tourists, which means they see the sites and stay in places that are sanitized from reality; or, they go in a service, ministry, or business capacity.  Tourist and service are both masculine roles.  In masculine roles, we have choices and power (even influence) over others and our situation.  In traditional feminine roles, we have little or no influence.  We must observe and let go of whatever comes at us.  Traveling in the feminine role is useful for freeing the darkest parts of our mind — especially our inner slavery.  It’s an inner, rather than outer, adventure.

In a country like Ecuador, everyone shares the same point of view.  They practice the same religion, and their culture has been molded into one common perspective.  They have no reason to question their perspective.  You’re either an insider or an outsider.

I accepted my feminine role as an outsider.  No one there even knew what I did.  I wasn’t trying to change minds; I was simply trying to free my own mind.   We tend to blindly accept beliefs when we’re in the feminine role because of our training as young children.  By willingly taking on a feminine role, we can see, discriminate, and let go of the automatic mental programs that accepted the beliefs of others without discriminating first.

 

Slavery

When I got home, this quote by Ezra Pound was on my Facebook wall.  “A slave is one who waits for someone to come and free him.”  Powerful quote!  

Physically everyone in Ecuador was free; yet mentally, no one was free.  We can’t see mental chains; most people train themselves to no longer feel them.  They don’t notice the smallness of their prison cell because others have the same cell.   They label their chains a fact of life — the truth.  

When acceptance lacks the desire for change, it’s not acceptance; it’s apathy.  Apathy keeps us stuck in slavery; apathy places hope in a savior.  

I grew up in a town with conformity of beliefs, much like Ecuador.  It was filled with apathy masking as acceptance.  Things usually came easier to me because my desires didn’t have to travel through a huge labyrinth of beliefs.  Then I married one of the insiders; over time, his cultural and religious beliefs infected my mind.  Everything became more difficult for me as his beliefs took root in my mind.  I kept weeding — attempting to remove his beliefs.  I just couldn’t find the causal root.  There was something in my mind that caused me to blindly believe him over and over again.  I looked everywhere for someone that could erase his beliefs — kissed a lot of frogs that weren’t princes during that time in my life.  I was stuck in slavery, looking for someone to rescue me.  No one did because they were slaves too.  Their techniques could provide relief from the effects; but they couldn’t eliminate the beliefs — the cause.

When I discovered letting go of beliefs, I was overjoyed.  I could now free my husband from his mental slavery too.  But he was looking for a physical savior.  My truth sounded crazy; he thought his beliefs were the truth.  “What, my problems aren’t real?  You think I created my problems?  You think my beliefs aren’t true?” he said again and again.  Over time, problems tend to have payoffs.  People bond around problems.  To expose their illusion feels unloving.  His family believed they were given a burden by God to carry together; and I was unwilling to share that burden so I was bad and unloving.

I hated their judgment of me.  I wasn’t bad or unloving; I was trying to free them.  I constantly tried to defend myself.  But proving their beliefs wrong meant holding on to their beliefs.  My freedom required letting go of their beliefs, not proving them wrong.  Right-wrong, win-lose, good-evil all keep us stuck in mental slavery.  Only by realizing that a belief is powerless and false, and letting it go, do we achieve real freedom.  We don’t have to correct beliefs; we only have to stop fueling them.  Let them go.  Without fuel, they die a natural death.

Ecuador tested me to stay free of beliefs that were very familiar.  Even with beliefs as thick as mud, I usually managed to let go.  Whenever I fell for a belief, I could feel my emotions closing in on me; I’d immediately go to work on my own mind.  I didn’t try to defend myself.  I didn’t try to prove them wrong.  I simply  took responsibility for my error and dug myself back out of the mental quicksand.  This time, I didn’t become a slave in their illusion.  I passed my own initiation test.

I observed the causal patterns within my mind that caused me to believe others in the past.  In almost every case, I didn’t want to be judged, I tried to defend myself, or I didn’t want to follow their rules.  In order to prove them wrong, I needed to accept their belief as real.  Now I was at war — the inner battle of good and evil that never ends.  The more I tried to fight their belief in my mind, the more real it became.  I was keeping myself enslaved in their world.  Only I could free myself.

Freedom is about knowing your OWN mind so well that others can’t tarnish it.  Freedom is about discriminating with such mastery that no one can trap us in their illusion.  Freedom is being our True Self anywhere and anytime.  Escaping the illusion requires thinking from true and false and micromanaging our own mind while allowing others to think whatever they want.  The other’s perspective was real for me only because I believed them.  They didn’t enslave me: I enslaved myself.  Therefore, I could also FREE myself and so can everyone else.

 

The Watcher (Watching Our Mind) and the Body

Initiation as blend of east and west

By Cathy Eck

 

The Watcher

We let go by first accessing our watcher or observer within — the place where our True Self is watching our thoughts.  Our True Self knows true from false because it listens to our emotions for guidance.  It grants us free will to accept false thoughts, and it releases the false thoughts when we decide they aren’t true.

In the east, seekers of enlightenment watch their minds until they can remain above them.  But often they talk harshly about the body because the false thoughts they rise above remain suppressed in their bodies.  The false self lives like a parasite in our body generating unwanted thoughts and conditions.  If we rise above those thoughts, they continue to grow in power; the parasite eventually destroys the host.

In the west, we adore the body to the extreme and ignore our false minds.  Westerners are experts at projecting unwanted thoughts on to others.  Modern technology calms our minds by fixing our bodies and life experiences (effects) until the effects become too great to fix.

Initiation blended these two perspectives together into one perfect whole.  Initiates watched their mind constantly.  Their body was the effect of their thoughts.  They found their false causal thoughts by following their emotions and letting go.  If they achieved freedom, they were said to have transcended death with resurrected bodies — Temples of the Living God.

They now lived largely outside the illusion (outside beliefs) creating whatever they wanted.  They’d dip into the illusion to assist people who wanted out.  They were in the business of saving people, but not in the way that religion saves people.  They saved people from religion.

 

Losing the Watcher

When I was young, I watched my mind full time.   That changed as I started to accept the ideas of authority figures.  I knew they were wrong because I felt it, but I wanted to avoid punishment.  By the time I was twenty, I rarely watched my mind; the skill had no benefit.  I started to believe that I must manage my way within the illusion; escape seemed impossible.

Later on, I discovered meditation.  It was very easy for me, but it wasn’t enough.  I didn’t want bliss twice a day for short periods of time.  I wanted it all the time.  I wanted to be in the world without it affecting me adversely.  I had no desire to live in an ashram, and I looked hideous in orange.  So I went back to what I loved to do as a child.  I watched my mind.  I was rusty and had to work my way back to my earlier level of skill.  I had to remember how to discriminate and let go.

 

Loneliness

Living in Ecuador, for the last two months, took me back to my early twenties when I abandoned the art of watching.  I remember feeling very lonely after I married.  This was strange since I never felt lonely as a child even though I lived in the country with no children around.  The culture and religion in Ecuador matched my husband’s family culture and religion.   Loneliness isn’t about missing others; it’s about missing our True Self.

I watched my mind deliver the same thoughts I heard and believed earlier in life.  My mind said no one cared about me, and I was out of place.  They felt bad then; and they really felt bad now.  But now I understood the role of emotions in discrimination, and I knew how to let go.  The emotions I felt in my body were saying those thoughts were false.  If I had been floating above my body in meditation, I wouldn’t have felt those emotions.  I wouldn’t have been able to discriminate.  Being connected to my body was painful since the emotions were very powerful.  But it allowed me to discriminate and let go.

Once I let go, I could see the cause of the thoughts.  Everyone here shares the same false self; they belong superficially — identical to my husband’s family.  But their True Self feels left out — out-of-place.  They fix their undercurrent of loneliness with festivals, dancing, sex, family, and traditions.  They fix the effect, not the cause.  I faced a trap that I’d fallen into earlier in life as my True Self also had no place in my marriage.  I sacrificed it to fit in to my new family.

Loneliness is like a giant fog here in Ecuador since nearly everyone has abandoned their True Self to fit in.  It wasn’t going to go away.  Eventually, I let go of all the false thoughts as untrue, and loneliness became impossible because my True Self was unveiled; the emotions stopped.

Part of me wanted to fix my friends’ loneliness; I’ve come to care about them very much.  This also matched my mind earlier in life because I wanted to relieve my husband’s loneliness.  That caring made letting go hard; but it wasn’t true caring.  The True Self doesn’t fix other people’s emotions.  The suffering is meant to force us to let go.  Sadly, most people don’t know they can let go.

Throughout history, initiation was an elite privilege.  Lower classes were slaves — too busy wiping the asses of the elite to escape.  Royalty, like most gurus of the east, learned to rise above their unwanted false thoughts by projecting them out on to inferior others.  This became The Big Secret.  But it’s a false-self technique.  Identifying with the spiritual, positive, superior, winning, and good thoughts can trick others into playing the role they don’t want to play for awhile.  But eventually, they won’t be able to hide their negative aspects under a nice-looking mask if we stop believing them and taking on their projection.

In initiation, anyone can watch their mind, anyone can feel emotions and discriminate, and anyone can let go.  Initiation is true divine justice because anyone can gain eternal FREEDOM.  And when we let it all go, we simply are the watcher.

Shortcut to Freedom: Win-Win Taken to the Extreme

Jesus Breaking Cross

By Cathy Eck

 

Shortcut to Freedom

A powerful shortcut to freedom is to take the concept of win-win to the extreme.  This is especially true if we need to see our religious, social, or cultural beliefs because they tend to look acceptable and normal.

We must understand how to use win-win as a tool for letting go of our false masculine mind to bring peace back to earth.  But hardly anyone can or will do it.

 

An Example

Recently, I went to the Prohibido Museo de Arte Extremo in Cuenca, Ecuador, where I’m still living temporarily.  It had an assortment of dragons, gothic art, monsters, and taboo pieces.  It was clearly one man’s life passion; he was very talented.  It was a courageous expression of art since Cuenca is an extremely religious town.

I was surprised when my Christian housemates recommended it to me.  After I visited Arte Extremo, we discussed the sculpture above.  It’s Jesus breaking his cross.

One of the things that started me searching for the initiation teachings was the Christian notion that authorities could kill God.  God represents omnipotence and immortality.  Either Jesus didn’t die; or he wasn’t God.  The notion that Jesus died for our sins as a martyr was an attempt to make sense of the crucifixion, but it fails miserably as a story ending.

I theorized that the correct perspective to Jesus’ story would cause it to read like a novel.  It would contain no contradictions.  The conclusion would be a logical ending to the story.  This project took about eight years of research.  In addition, I had to let go of everything that  I thought I knew about Jesus.  Eventually, I found the perspective I sought; it was called initiation.  My theory, which became my Ph.D. dissertation, proved to be sound.  Jesus’ story did read like an ancient novel from the initiate’s perspective.

Since my project, religious art has taken on new life.  So many great artists, like Michelangelo and da Vinci, had an initiate’s perspective and gave us clues through their art.  Only those who had eyes to see saw the clues.  I had no doubt that this extreme artist was tuned into the initiates’ channel.

Jesus breaking his cross represented freedom in initiation.  The cross was a metaphor for being stuck in the illusion.  A God wouldn’t be stuck in the illusion.  The sculpture from this perspective expressed a win-win point of view.  Jesus would be telling us to break our crosses, not wear them around our neck.  It seems that the artist saw Jesus as a true God, more powerful than any distorted human authority’s perspective.  Isn’t that how a God would be?  Wouldn’t a God save us little mortals from authority?

Who benefits from believing that authority is more powerful than God?  Authority does.  If authority can kill God, what chance in hell do we have?  We’ll blindly obey.

 

Win-Win Perspective

I discussed the sculpture with my housemates after my return from the museum.  One of them said that he wasn’t offended at all.  He views art as expression that often challenges our thinking; this artist did what many artists do.

The other was bothered by the sculpture and saw it as anti-Christian.  She said that it’s wrong to say Jesus didn’t die because he did.  I could see where she was coming from.  Her beliefs connected her to a special group perspective, and it’s all she’d ever known.  She believed that she was saved and Jesus was her savior.

Getting free isn’t about proving who’s right or wrong, it’s about win-win or win-lose.  Her saving has no value unless all people are fallen sinners.  The initiates didn’t believe in sin; they believed in wrong thinking, which could be dropped.  My housemate’s belief that Jesus died for our sins requires Jesus, a God, to have died.  If he broke the cross and stood up to authority, the whole belief system would shatter.  If all people are sinners, and Jesus didn’t save anyone, then she’s hell-bound scum just like the rest of us.  The artist pulled the magic carpet out from beneath the Christian savior illusion with one silent statue.  But look what happens when we join him.  Authority loses its power; we move toward win-win.  Jesus didn’t die; authority did.

If God can’t be harmed by authority, and if we all have a True Self (God) aspect within, then authority has no real power.  We can only be harmed by authority if we obey them, believe them, and accept their perspective as true.  Isn’t that exactly what religion does to people?  The religious perspective kills Jesus everyday so that we don’t have to deal with our own sinning (false thinking).

When we hold on to win-lose, we lose our own chance at freedom.  We don’t just harm others; we hurt ourselves.  In the eyes of truth, we aren’t truly good until we can live from win-win in the extreme — where our perspective is so expansive that it gives everyone the potential to win (without having to accept our beliefs).

Extreme win-win forces us to purify our masculine false mind.  We become harmless to anyone and everyone.  Expanding our perspective to see if it’s win-win for all turns us into true leaders.  It  forces our false mind to be objective and unconditionally loving.  Once our mind is win-win to the extreme, it’s returned to the way it was initially — the goal of initiation.

The final test of initiation was the crucifixion.  The initiate took one last dip into a powerless, feminine role.  This was my purpose in coming to Ecuador — to allow my own remaining beliefs to come at me — and they did.  This is why Jesus didn’t fight in his story.  Instead of doing harm to others, the initiate allowed whatever was left in their mind to be done to themselves.  The key was to realize that whatever came at them was false.  If they failed the test, they died.  If they passed the test, they lived as resurrected beings, completely free of the illusion.

 

Prohibido Museo Arte De Extremo, Cuenca, Ecuador

A Seductive Trap: The Superior False Self

Getting off the cross

By Cathy Eck

 

Seductive Trap

The false self is the opposite of the True Self.  But the reverse doesn’t apply.  The True Self isn’t the opposite of the false self.  Sounds illogical, I know.  But when you understand this, you’ll no longer fall into a very seductive trap.

Look at the most popular self-help programs today, and you’ll notice that they take something that is unwanted (false belief) and flip to the opposite thinking.  It now sounds like they’re teaching the truth.  But they aren’t.  They’re expressing the opposite of something false.  True words inserted into the false self are still false, not true.

Truth is accessed by the elimination of all that’s false, not the opposition of it.  I’ve often labeled this false superiority clone mind; it’s a huge trap for seekers.

 

Truth Has No Opposite

If we’re caught in this trap, we’ll feel like we’re good or right; and there’s an enemy out there that’s wrong or evil.  We’ll often feel proud of our superior position or expertise.  We might feel angry or fearful when we think of the opposition.  The best technique for getting rid of this mental trap is the triangle process.  When we eliminate both the right and the wrong, the good and the evil, from our OWN mind, we naturally end up resting in the truth, without opposite.  Now the beliefs of others show up as meaningless, false, and powerless.  They aren’t opposing us anymore.

People spend fortunes on programs that prey on our susceptibility to this trap.  If our undesirable state is poverty, they teach us how to get rich.  If we’ve been taught that we’re sinners, they’ll teach us how to be good.  We don’t want to be fat; so they teach us how to be thin.

Initiates called this being stuck on the cross.  It’s a great metaphor.  It means you’re stuck on the horizontal arms of the cross moving between opposites.  You can’t move in the vertical direction toward truth.

 

An Example

One day you’re feeling unloved.  You’re very aware of your beliefs and emotions.  Underneath your emotion is a belief like, “Nobody loves me or I don’t matter.”  If you dive down into your emotions, you’ll discover the exact causal belief.  You’ll realize that your belief isn’t true because it feels horrible, and you’ll let it go.  You’ll never believe that thinking and the corresponding emotional signal again.  If you happen to think it, it will look silly and false.

But let’s say that instead of letting go of the causal belief, a friend or family member comes along and says “I love you.  Don’t feel bad.”  It feels like they fixed your problem.  But they just put sprinkles on your bullshit.  For now, the emotion appears to be gone because your mind temporarily focuses on their nice words.  But that fix will wear off; you’ll need them to tell you those words again and again and again.  If they don’t say the words when you feel unloved, you might manipulate them into telling you they love you.  You might work tirelessly to get approval and love from any outsider, you could take drugs to numb yourself, or you might even pay someone else to give  you love.

People look for gurus and priests to tell them that they’re spiritual and good, teachers to tell them they can become prosperous, and doctors to tell them they’re healthy, etc.  We’ll accept belief after belief to patch our holes.  But the holes don’t stay patched.  The causal belief is still there, and it will reopen the hole in time.  Our holes need constant maintenance.

 

We Can Let Go

Occasionally, someone realizes that the answer isn’t outside.  They’ve looked everywhere, but they still have holes.  They realize that they’ve been trying to fix an imperfection that wasn’t even true.  The imperfection was a false, causal belief.  Now they’re ripe for initiation.  They’ll let go of anything.

Until the false self looks painfully stupid and wrong, most people won’t let it go.  The false self is very resistant to letting go of anything that it believes makes it superior.  People fear that if they let go of their positive bubbly self, they’ll become negative.  They fear that if they let go of their good girl or boy, they’ll become evil.  That isn’t true as long as we let go of both of the opposing sides of duality (triangle process).

If they’re an expert, their false mind will try to hold on to knowledge.  That’s how they make money.  They don’t realize that letting go of knowledge reveals true wisdom.  Wisdom is the only thing that’s true.  It can fulfill our desires much better than knowledge.

If we’re in a religion that says we’ve been chosen and everyone else is going to die in the apocalypse, we’re in a false superior trap.  We don’t want to lose our spot on the train to heaven so we hold on to our beliefs.

This is where the win-win test is invaluable.  We must look at our thoughts to see if they work for everyone in the universe.  If they don’t, they’re false beliefs with an opposite.  We’re in a false superior place.  It’s often hard to see the opposite within without the win-win test.  We’ve all become so good at projecting our unwanted beliefs on to others.  We’re sure the other is evil or wrong.  We don’t believe that our letting go can strip their false power, but it can.  Because they’re simply reflecting the other half of our dual thinking.  They complete us.  Yikes!!!

The goal of initiation was no beliefs — none, nada.  It allowed one to return to a pure, creative and unified state of mind.  After purification, the initiates inserted beliefs in their minds for creative purposes only; they let the beliefs go when their creative usefulness was done.  All creation was beneficial for everyone.  They never saw themselves as special or superior.  They didn’t have enemies.  They only saw themselves as free.

 

Who Is Hurting Whom? A Relationship Trap

Relationship problems

By Cathy Eck

 

Relationship Difficulties

The illusion is always backwards from the truth.  Once we’re lost in it, we can’t see the truth.  We’re filled with emotions; and we just want someone, anyone, to fix them.

Most arguments happen because one person or group wants others to eliminate their emotions or fulfill their false needs and wants.  However, if we meet another’s need or want, they aren’t likely to fix the cause.  They’ll just expected us to fulfill it again and again.  Inspirational speakers and clergy, advertising, drug companies, and traditional medicine and therapy all prey upon this aspect of the illusion.  We will come back again and again for a fix, and they will gladly continue to bill us.

Initiation saved me from this trap.  From the initiate’s perspective, relationship exposes the places that our false self still holds beliefs.  If someone can upset us, or we fear them, our false self is afraid of losing power to them.  They’re playing a masculine role in an illusion where we’re feminine.  If we feel we must control or fix others, we’re playing the masculine role.  In the illusion, of course, the masculine role appears to have all the power.

As we travel the path of initiation, we find it increasingly difficult to meet another’s false needs or wants.  We want authentic relationships.  Even money isn’t enough incentive to play a permanent false role in another’s life.  We want others to join us in freedom.  And often, we’ll try to convince them to let go.

We can look rude or uncaring when we suggest letting go or won’t do what they believe they want or need.  But once we see the world’s suffering as an illusion created by FALSE beliefs, we can’t pretend it’s true anymore.  We can’t feel good about fixing effects.   This is one of those awkward stages.  We find it hard to sympathize with their false problems.  We can’t condone their disempowering labels.  We often feel bad about this because we do care.

They think their beliefs, needs, and wants are real and won’t go away.  They believe what their mind tells them; they refuse to let go.  Usually, we can see that their problems have a payoff; they manipulate others to fill their deeper false need or want, such as loneliness, insecurity, or lack of love.  They create a false connection to others, which appears to sooth their separation from their own True Self.

 

A Simple Example

Your partner asks you to spend time with them.  You say, “No, I want to be alone tonight.”  So partner says, “So I’m not important.  You’re so hurtful.  You don’t care about me.”  Those are three imaginary false self statements.  Your partner is giving you reasons for why you said “No.”  But none of them are true; you know that.  Your partner, however, has deep loneliness at the core of their false self.   They don’t want to feel that loneliness and let it go; they want you to take it away.

Often our social brainwashing kicks in.  We fix their need; and we feel obligated to fix it.  Then we’ll get entangled in their illusive reality.  In time, we’ll resent them.

 

Who’s Hurting Whom?

Nothing has caused me more confusion and pain in my life than this confusing issue.  I can see the beliefs that keep others stuck, and I simply refuse to condone them.  But I’ve often been seen as rude and uncaring for exposing others’  beliefs.  Their false self would think I was trying to hurt them.

I lived in a world of people who were addicted to the illusion and wished me to grant them a moment of comfort rather than a life of freedom.  I simply didn’t belong.  My gift for freeing people was a curse in their illusion.  Beliefs are sacred in the illusion.  One who tries to change or eliminate them is evil.

I know I’m not alone.  Many people now see that freedom is the most loving thing we can give another.  And they, too, often feel like strangers in a strange world.

From the perspective of initiation, the general rule to see who hurt whom is to look at who’s generating emotions.  But people with giant false selves have become masters of the illusion.  They can often say something like our partner above without displaying any emotion.  That’s because they truly believe they’re entitled to our attention.  Their loneliness feels real, even infinite.  They have pride or rightness about their beliefs.  If we don’t see what they’re doing, we’ll drown with them.

If our partner was paying attention to their own emotions, they’d notice that none of their statements felt good.  They aren’t the truth.  They’re meaningless mind recordings from their past.  They’d let them go.  We wouldn’t have to fill their false need; they’d now understand us.  They wouldn’t attach false meaning to our words.  They’d thank us for helping them get closer to their True Self.

Our social customs are confusing because they focus on physical actions and not mental clearing.  Being there for another doesn’t mean listening to them dump baggage on us, soothing their emotions, or filling their false needs.  Our normal social customs create codependence, possession, and bondage; they don’t support truly loving relationship.  Gone too far, they can even lead to physical, emotional, and mental abuse.  Besides, our social customs are really expensive.

The ancient teachers taught that our false self wasn’t meant to be connected to others.  It was devised as an individual container so that we could create individually.  When someone says they need us, they’re trying to link false minds.  They want us to fix the effect of their beliefs.  They’re actually hurting us while saying we’re hurting them.  They want us to be half of an illusory whole.

Initiation is about undoing all of our false self connections and finding our true wholeness.  When we’re no longer linked to others via beliefs, needs, and wants, we’re free, and they’re free too.