Dealing with Fragile Egos as Characters

fragile ego

By Cathy Eck

 

Fragile Egos

When someone holds their beliefs as absolutely true, they become a “fragile ego.” Fragile egos exist at all levels of society.  We have to let them break to get free.

Fragile egos send a clear message:  “If you obey me, I’ll reward you.  If you disobey, I’ll punish.”  They’re clones of the Old Testament false God (imaginary leader of the illusion) who believe they’re good people with the right to judge and punish.

Whoever disagrees with them is evil or bad.  Their biggest fear is exposure.  They lie and impose their beliefs on others in order to look powerful while hiding their belief that they’re weak.

The most dangerous fragile egos wear a nice mask causing them to look like a True Self.  They say and do what the illusion considers good; they generally look happy and calm.  They believe that what you do, not how you think, makes you good.  Good, by their definition gets rewarded.  That’s how the illusion works.

But the true world doesn’t work that way.  Rules and projection don’t exist outside the illusion, we manifest what we believe.

Underneath the fragile ego’s mask is an emotional storm; their actions aren’t congruent with their thinking.  They’re filled with rules and beliefs.  When we disobey or say, “No,” to their demands, their emotions roar.  They don’t see their OWN thinking as the cause of their emotions.  They blame the feminine role because their Adam-and-Eve based mythology gave them the right to.

The fragile ego projects their responsibility and emotions outward.  In fact, when we’re conditioned by fragile egos, we often become overly responsible.  We take responsibility for their emotions because they claim we’re the cause.  We aren’t.

 

The Wall

In mentoring, I call the eruption of the fragile ego, “hitting the wall.”  Letting go looks impossible.  Strong religious, scientific, or political views look absolutely true.  Arguing with the fragile ego does no good.  The fragile ego repeats its knowledge, rules, and beliefs like a robot.  It sees evidence that supports its thinking; it’s sure it’s right.

We only see evidence because we believe the cause.  We hold a really strong belief, but it’s still false.  If we let go of the causal belief, we’ll see different evidence.  When we try to challenge fragile ego beliefs in ourselves or others, psychological reversals kick in.  The thoughts clearly generate emotion, they’re not win-win, and they’re taking us away from freedom; but we can’t remember that the emotion means false.  Until we routinely catch this in ourselves, we won’t catch it in others.

 

They’re Characters

Our OWN fragile ego consists of voice recordings acquired from others who forced their beliefs into our mind.  We did feel emotions when we first heard their words; but we were afraid to challenge them.  Their words are NOW constantly squatting in our mind.

After letting go for awhile, we do come to know that the recordings are false.  And yet, people tell me that the fragile ego is still running their life.   They still behave as the fragile ego would want them to behave or say what the fragile ego would consider socially or politically correct.  They still can’t be themselves.

 

An Exercise

Imagine yourself in the center of your mind; see the fragile egos who have limited your life with beliefs, rules, and knowledge in the periphery of a giant circle looking at you.  They’re keeping you from leaving the circle.

Review old memories in your mind. Bring up fragile ego encounters from the past. Let the fragile ego characters slowly replay the scene.  Discriminate and let go as they talk.  Also let go of any judgments or reasoning that arises in your mind about these characters. Judgment on your part keeps you stuck to them.  You might never see them again; but when you clean up their character in your own mind, you won’t meet that same sort of person again.  Of if you do, you’ll stay powerful.

You can take this even further.  We tend to think that we must change the real life fragile ego characters or get them to stop judging us.  But many of them will never change or stop judging.  Are you going to wait until they change to live your life?  I hope not.

Step into their character within your own mind.  Speak their beliefs, and feel their emotions arise when they speak something false or judgmental.  Assume they can discriminate and let go, and do so.  It’s your mind!  These are your characters! You have the power to clean up their words in your mind.  In this way, we change the past.

See if this fragile ego still has power over you.  If so, ask yourself, “Why?”  Let go of the reasons that your mind gives you.  Clean up more memories.

You aren’t affecting the real life person in any way — good or bad.  When your mind is clear, they won’t bother you.  Their beliefs will only affect them.

Our false minds were meant to be creative containers, separate and distinct from others people’s minds, so we could all create independently.  We’ve never had the right to impose our beliefs on others.  We only do it because others did it to us.

When you realize that you don’t deserve their judgment, they don’t have power over you anymore.  When you understand that their rules are false, they don’t apply to you.  If they say that you’re hurting them, you don’t take it in.  In fact, I’ll often say to fragile egos, “You’re telling me what I should believe; how can I be hurting you?”

Fragile egos can be difficult.  But we can get through that wall if we take our rock hammer and chip away one belief or memory at a time.  Eventually, we’ll break through their highly tinted glass.  We’ll escape their influence without fighting them.  When we clean our OWN mind, they lose their false power.  They can’t harm us anymore.

 

There Are No Rules Except Those You Believe

The Eagle Landing

The eagle has no rules to follow. It lives from its True Self, doing what it was meant to do.  It is perfect.

 By Cathy Eck

 

How to Succeed at Anything

Within the hypnotic win-lose illusion that most people think is reality, success happens in one of two ways.  Either we make our own rules and convince others to accept them or follow them, or we follow someone else’s rules.  Often our parents choose our rulebook for us.

The false mind is the keeper of rules.  It rewards us when we follow its rules,  and it punishes us when we don’t.  God (the True Self) has no rules.

Our false self punishes us when we disobey rules, not God.  If you are like most people, you do a damn good job of punishing yourself and anyone else that breaks the rules you believe to be right.

For most of my life, I looked for someone’s rules to follow.  I looked to every religion, every philosopher, and anyone with even a little authority.  Their rules were just not acceptable for me.  I wanted to live from my True Self, the place of no rules.

 

We Can Make Our Own Rules

We have the right to make our own rules, but we usually don’t because we’ve been convinced by authority that we must obey their rules.  The world began with no rules.  The illusion was created when leaders made up rules and wrapped them in fear of a false God that would curse, punish, and smite the disobedient.

These leaders were privileged people who knew the secrets of life; and they used those secrets to gain power over others, rather than empower others.  They knew that we make our own rules; and they also knew that if you instill fear, guilt, or shame in someone, they will follow your rules.

It is easy to follow your own rules — especially when they exalt you and diminish others.  Leaders still convince us that their rules are THE rules, and they benefit from that.  When someone sees through their selfish game, they label the wise seer a heretic, traitor, or evil because with no rules, they have no power over others.

 

Doesn’t “No Rules” Lead to Chaos?

People believe that without rules, the world would be chaos.  The opposite is true.  All rules come from a core belief that people are bad.  If we are bad, we need morals and rules to keep us in check.  So the false illusion is based on the premise that people are born bad.  Once you think you are bad, you either follow the rules to be good or you rebel against the rules and prove the authorities right.  Both contribute to sustaining the illusion.

If you follow someone’s rules or promote another’s rules, you’re living in their false illusion.  You’ve kicked out your True Self (and God) and put someone else in charge of your life.  Without our True Self connection, we feel unsafe and alone.

 

Rules are Beliefs

Rules are simply beliefs.  Beliefs are divided thoughts.  We need divided thought to create.  You can’t see these black words on a black page.  But beliefs are meant to be temporary.

Parents make ridiculous rules.  Many teachers should be in prison for their rules.  And don’t even get me started with clergy.  Business people start out with great visions, and pretty soon they have a bunch of rules.  The false mind loves rules; obedience is its modus operandi.  Obedience runs the military, causing millions to ignore their True Self and kill others.  The True Self, however, is like the eagle.  It follows a win-win vision.

I used to buy lots of diet books.  They all have the same format.  For the first two chapters, they convince you that their rules are right.  Eat bananas and coconut oil for two weeks and get a svelte figure.  So why don’t diets work?  We know that most people will gain the weight they lose back plus a few extra pounds as a bonus.  Diets don’t work because they are a commitment to follow someone else’s rules.  Your body is not fond of doing that because your body is hard-wired to your True Self.  Besides, the first three letters of diet are DIE.

I bought my last diet book when I realized that calories are a measure of heat.  If I eat too many calories I should get hot, not fat.  Since that day, I’ve let go of thousands of beliefs about food.  One day, I’ll just be my perfect weight.  I won’t have to DIE to get there.

 

A Life of No Rules

We have to realize that other people’s rules are for them to follow.  Most people don’t even follow their own rules.  They just want you to follow them.  If someone’s rules don’t bring you pleasure, let them go.

I will follow a win-win rule, like stopping at a traffic light.  It doesn’t play favorites.  Its purpose is organization.  I won’t follow win-lose rules that support elitism.  No one has the right to make rules for another that restrict their freedom and joy.

The most important rules to let go are those that cause us to feel shame, guilt, or fear when we disobey them.  When you let go of all the rules you’ve been following, you will find a wonderful secret.

Spoiler Alert!  When you become your True Self, you have the power to create win-lose rules and even get people to follow them.  But you won’t do it.  Only a false self makes and follows win-lose rules.  A false self wants power because it is powerless.  The True Self has unlimited power so it doesn’t need power.  The True Self is like the eagle. It does what it was designed to do, which is always perfect and always free because the eagle has no rules.

 

For Part II of this article, click here.