No Longer a Victim: Escaping Victimhood Forever (Part II)

Predators and prey

By Cathy Eck

 

For part I, click here.

 

Getting Unstuck

Unraveling victimhood requires understanding how we got stuck in it in the first place.  The intricacies of the illusion need to be exposed; but until recently, exposing the illusion meant a short life or lots of torture.  I faced those fears every day in the early stages of writing this blog.

The illusion lives on because we can’t see the cause of the problems in our lives.  We’re all victims of magical slight of mind.  We’re told to look outward to people who aren’t the true cause instead of inward to our beliefs because the illusion needs believers.  Remember the word belief contains the word “LIE” within it.

When we fix effects instead of the cause of anything, the problems keeps repeating.  A perpetrator shows up in our life as the effect of our own causal beliefs.  But I know, it doesn’t look that way when we’re in it.  The cause is never outside.  In addition, nothing is incurable; but we must find the causal belief.

Victim, perpetrator, and rescuer are all different forms of masculine and feminine roles playing off of each other.  In truth, there are no roles.  They’re all illusory.  We’re also trained to see the feminine role as powerless.  That training is very difficult to break.  Victim is generally a feminine role; however, some victims are actually perpetrators in disguise.  As people have become smarter, they’ve become better players of the illusion game.

When we’re free of beliefs, no one can trigger us — we remain calm and peaceful all the time.  If I say to you, “You’re an elephant.”  You’ll laugh.  You know you aren’t an elephant.  If I say, “You’re stupid.”  You might believe me.  Your mind will search for times you were stupid.  I’ve triggered your belief that you can be stupid.  If you let that belief go, you’ll not be bothered by my comment.  You’ll laugh because you know it’s false.  This is key; I’m only a perpetrator if you believe what I say.  Otherwise, I’m a comedian.

 

Enlightenment Defined

The difference between tragedy and drama is drama has less beliefs.  The difference between drama and comedy is comedy has less beliefs.  As we let go, we laugh more.  We become lighter; we enlighten.  When we have NO beliefs, we can’t be tricked or triggered by others.  We stay light.

We’re often shocked at the beliefs that arise in our mind as we witness our emotions.  We never consciously accepted most of these beliefs.  We suddenly realize how heavy our thinking is.

I often hear,  “I wasn’t raised in religion; yet I’m finding religious beliefs in my mind. How did they get in there?”  I was shocked by this too.  As I let go, I become aware of the person who gave me the belief.  The mystery does start to unravel.  Letting go causes us to break false-self connections with people who gave us beliefs.   Consequently, people fear they’ll lose someone if they let go of their shared beliefs.  Often they feel strong resistance from the other as they try to let go.  If we keep letting go, we’ll eventually have only a True Self connection with people — just unconditional love.

We got beliefs by being born to people who had them even if they didn’t talk about them.  Kids are telepathic until at least seven years of age.  We’ve sympathized with religious friends and family.  When we believe another’s problem, we also believe the causal belief that they can’t see.  We fear religious people who impose their beliefs on us.  If we fear something, we believe it.  Or we’ve had a teacher of truth or followed inspirational speakers who float above their beliefs.  Remember, if we’re going to someone for the truth, we believe we don’t have it.  So we make a great projection screen for someone who believes they have the truth, when they don’t.

 

Shared Beliefs

We all have perpetrator-victim within us until we let both roles go.  The master and the slave both believe in slavery.  The slave has an inner master and the master an inner slave.  The criminal and policemen both believe in crime.  Neither can play their role without the other.  They’re like conjoined twins.  They’re both victims of the illusion playing false roles.  That’s why criminals often plead temporary insanity.  They don’t know how they got into the role; but once they did, they played the it like they were going for an OSCAR.

Because of the way we hold masculine and feminine roles in mind, it appears that the slave is stuck in the master’s illusion.  We forget that the master needs the slaves or his desire is thwarted.  The policeman needs criminals.  Doctors need patients.

This is difficult to understand because of our perceptual training.  We’re taught to see doctors as good; they’re serving.  (See comic book truth for more.)  If we drop all belief in disease, we don’t need doctors.  They move from rescuer to perpetrator.

Soldier is a completely illusory feminine role (obedience and sacrifice), yet people sign up to kill because it’s reframed as service and heroism.  Our desire to be seen as good or worthy gets us in victim roles.  The trick wouldn’t work if we let go of the beliefs that say we aren’t good or worthy.

We must ask ourselves, “Why do I feel compelled to play this role?”  The answers we get will all be false; they’re our causal beliefs.  Another good question is, “What is the perpetrator thinking about me?”  Again, whatever answers arise are beliefs, let them go.  You can’t let go of the truth, and our mind is 99.99% bullshit.  So always err on the side of letting go.

Once we strengthen our True Self (our true savior) and weaken our own false self (which has both victim, rescuer, and perpetrator), we can no longer be cast into these illusory roles — we can’t be a victim anymore.

To be continued…

 

 

Storytelling or History: What’s the Difference?

Footprints in the Sand

By Cathy Eck

 

Storytelling Versus History

I enjoy stories very much.  I love to read them, to write them, and to watch them on the big screen.  But I don’t like history at all.  History is usually presented by the winners; it’s masculine-dominant (his story, not her story) and fact driven, not character driven.  In short, it’s food for the intellect, the false self.

The difference between storytelling and history has become blurred in people’s minds because our educational systems emphasize history over storytelling.  We can learn a lot by studying the difference between storytelling and history.

If we want to write a story, we first develop characters and maybe a plot or a story idea.  We give the characters a false-self perspective, including a back story, preferences, and beliefs.  Then we turn the characters loose and let them interact.  If the characters don’t like the results they’re getting, they’ll hopefully have a change of mind.  If the characters don’t change their mind, the story eventually becomes predictable and boring.  If the characters don’t grow, viewers will stop feeling sympathy for their troubles.

We see these things clearly on the big screen, but often ignore them in our own lives.  Suffering isn’t natural; it’s the consequence of being unwilling to expand our perspective and grow.  Suffering comes from holding on to what we no longer need.  Mental hoarding, just like physical hoarding, is destructive.

 

Life is Storytelling

We’re all living a potentially great story whether we know it or not.  Two decades ago, the Story of “The Legend spontaneously popped out of my unconscious.  That began my exploration into the nature of storytelling.  I could see that “The Legend” was like an undercurrent in my life.  Fairy tales, myths, and religious stories sit in our unconscious as causal forces in our life.  This is why religions and cultures are built on a foundation of storytelling.  We’re controlled by the stories we hold in mind as true.  If we share a common foundation of story with another, we’ll have similar beliefs and see the world through homogeneous eyes.

Modern video games take storytelling to a new level.  I used to watch my children play them, moving from level to level.  If their character screwed up, they’d say, “Oh, I died.”  They’d restart the game.  I felt as though I was watching a miniature version of life.  You either make it to the next level in your storyline, or you die.  The difference is that the gamer realizes he’s responsible for his fate.

 

His Story

History is literal.  There’s no room for individuality or interpretation.  It’s simply the reporting of facts — names, dates, and physical events.  History is always one-sided; usually the winners write history.  As we’ve become more left-brained or intellectual, we’ve forgotten the cause and effect relationship in life.  We fail to consider that every event has a belief-related cause behind it.  We accept the winner’s false-self projection that their enemy is evil and deserving of punishment.

Today, people share their personal stories in historical form.  They think they’re storytelling, but they aren’t.  Great stories allow for change; and great storytellers allow their characters to transform.  People have labeled the oldest stories mythology because they find so many versions of the old stories.  Old stories changed as the characters changed.  History put an end to that; history keeps us stuck within a false, collective mindset.

 

The Key

The true storyteller knew that he created every single character, even the evil ones.  The historian only identifies with one character — the one they label good or right.  

The historian acts as if he or she is either a hero or victim.  They’re telling the story to get sympathy, attention, or approval.  If they get such rewards, they’ll continue to tell the story to keep it alive.

Often we get stuck in another person’s story; we feel like we can’t get free.  We feel bad if we expose another as cause in their drama because we’ve been trained to feel guilty for revealing the cause of history.  We aren’t supposed to point out that the Emperor is naked.

 

Freedom

Freedom requires owning all the characters in our story and seeing that they fit together like a puzzle.  The victim and perpetrator/hero are opposites who have divided thought in the same way (see the triangle process); and the evil that the hero fights is simply his or her shadow.

The psychologist Fritz Perls popularized Gestalt therapy.  Perls studied people’s dreams.  He required them to see themselves as every character and even every essential item in the dream.  In this way, they could step back and see their whole mind; they could see themselves as cause.  When we see our whole mind, we see the mental cause of our problems.  Then we can change our mind more easily.

 

We’re All Storytelling

Many have said that we’re all storytelling.  We invent a story; then ideally we direct, produce, and star in it.  But when we don’t own our mind, we just play a walk-on part in someone else’s drama.  When we follow the false mind (which we acquired from others) over our heart (True Self), our own story remains unlived and untold.  We don’t grow or change.  Life becomes boring, and we feel without purpose.

This happens when we accept masculine and feminine roles; and we place ourselves in a feminine role to another.  Dropping roles that don’t bring us joy is key to returning to our own original story.

Screenwriters say that the audience wants an inciting incident (usually a fall of sorts) in the first ten minutes.  From the perspective of story, we plan our fall into the illusion.  You probably lived that part of your story.  But what happened after that.  Did you learn?  Did you grow?  Did you change?  Did you let go of your “evil” shadow?  Did you love?  That’s what makes a story great.  And most important, did you get that precious and rare happily ever after?