Dealing with Fragile Egos as Characters

fragile ego

By Cathy Eck

 

Fragile Egos

When someone holds their beliefs as absolutely true, they become a “fragile ego.” Fragile egos exist at all levels of society.  We have to let them break to get free.

Fragile egos send a clear message:  “If you obey me, I’ll reward you.  If you disobey, I’ll punish.”  They’re clones of the Old Testament false God (imaginary leader of the illusion) who believe they’re good people with the right to judge and punish.

Whoever disagrees with them is evil or bad.  Their biggest fear is exposure.  They lie and impose their beliefs on others in order to look powerful while hiding their belief that they’re weak.

The most dangerous fragile egos wear a nice mask causing them to look like a True Self.  They say and do what the illusion considers good; they generally look happy and calm.  They believe that what you do, not how you think, makes you good.  Good, by their definition gets rewarded.  That’s how the illusion works.

But the true world doesn’t work that way.  Rules and projection don’t exist outside the illusion, we manifest what we believe.

Underneath the fragile ego’s mask is an emotional storm; their actions aren’t congruent with their thinking.  They’re filled with rules and beliefs.  When we disobey or say, “No,” to their demands, their emotions roar.  They don’t see their OWN thinking as the cause of their emotions.  They blame the feminine role because their Adam-and-Eve based mythology gave them the right to.

The fragile ego projects their responsibility and emotions outward.  In fact, when we’re conditioned by fragile egos, we often become overly responsible.  We take responsibility for their emotions because they claim we’re the cause.  We aren’t.

 

The Wall

In mentoring, I call the eruption of the fragile ego, “hitting the wall.”  Letting go looks impossible.  Strong religious, scientific, or political views look absolutely true.  Arguing with the fragile ego does no good.  The fragile ego repeats its knowledge, rules, and beliefs like a robot.  It sees evidence that supports its thinking; it’s sure it’s right.

We only see evidence because we believe the cause.  We hold a really strong belief, but it’s still false.  If we let go of the causal belief, we’ll see different evidence.  When we try to challenge fragile ego beliefs in ourselves or others, psychological reversals kick in.  The thoughts clearly generate emotion, they’re not win-win, and they’re taking us away from freedom; but we can’t remember that the emotion means false.  Until we routinely catch this in ourselves, we won’t catch it in others.

 

They’re Characters

Our OWN fragile ego consists of voice recordings acquired from others who forced their beliefs into our mind.  We did feel emotions when we first heard their words; but we were afraid to challenge them.  Their words are NOW constantly squatting in our mind.

After letting go for awhile, we do come to know that the recordings are false.  And yet, people tell me that the fragile ego is still running their life.   They still behave as the fragile ego would want them to behave or say what the fragile ego would consider socially or politically correct.  They still can’t be themselves.

 

An Exercise

Imagine yourself in the center of your mind; see the fragile egos who have limited your life with beliefs, rules, and knowledge in the periphery of a giant circle looking at you.  They’re keeping you from leaving the circle.

Review old memories in your mind. Bring up fragile ego encounters from the past. Let the fragile ego characters slowly replay the scene.  Discriminate and let go as they talk.  Also let go of any judgments or reasoning that arises in your mind about these characters. Judgment on your part keeps you stuck to them.  You might never see them again; but when you clean up their character in your own mind, you won’t meet that same sort of person again.  Of if you do, you’ll stay powerful.

You can take this even further.  We tend to think that we must change the real life fragile ego characters or get them to stop judging us.  But many of them will never change or stop judging.  Are you going to wait until they change to live your life?  I hope not.

Step into their character within your own mind.  Speak their beliefs, and feel their emotions arise when they speak something false or judgmental.  Assume they can discriminate and let go, and do so.  It’s your mind!  These are your characters! You have the power to clean up their words in your mind.  In this way, we change the past.

See if this fragile ego still has power over you.  If so, ask yourself, “Why?”  Let go of the reasons that your mind gives you.  Clean up more memories.

You aren’t affecting the real life person in any way — good or bad.  When your mind is clear, they won’t bother you.  Their beliefs will only affect them.

Our false minds were meant to be creative containers, separate and distinct from others people’s minds, so we could all create independently.  We’ve never had the right to impose our beliefs on others.  We only do it because others did it to us.

When you realize that you don’t deserve their judgment, they don’t have power over you anymore.  When you understand that their rules are false, they don’t apply to you.  If they say that you’re hurting them, you don’t take it in.  In fact, I’ll often say to fragile egos, “You’re telling me what I should believe; how can I be hurting you?”

Fragile egos can be difficult.  But we can get through that wall if we take our rock hammer and chip away one belief or memory at a time.  Eventually, we’ll break through their highly tinted glass.  We’ll escape their influence without fighting them.  When we clean our OWN mind, they lose their false power.  They can’t harm us anymore.

 

Intuition or Inspiration: What’s the Difference?

Imagination vs. intuition

By Cathy Eck

 

Inspiration

I tell people to let go and follow their inspiration.  However, there’s often confusion around my words because most people think that inspiration and intuition are the same.

I never heard the word intuition growing up.  I did hear another word a lot — imagination.  “Cathy, get out of your imagination.”  No one understood imagination either.  We all have imaginary capacity.  But most people use it the wrong way.  They use it to fuel their fear by imagining problems, pain, and suffering.

 

We’re Creators

I can’t say enough that we’re born to be creators.  But I’m using the word creator in the truest sense, where we would only create things that were win-win for everyone.  All creating starts in our imagination.  We can use our imagination to create our unique heaven on earth, or we can use it to create hell.

I remember the first time I realized that.  My husband and I were visiting his parents, who took pride in their ability to worry about everything.  Often the very thing they worried about would end up happening to someone.  One day, I couldn’t take it anymore; I told them to stop it.  You see, when I or someone else reflected their worry, they didn’t take responsibility.  They’d say, “Oh, I just knew it.”   They acted like they were prophets; and that wasn’t the case.  Their worry was misused creative power, and they were projecting it out with a very strong force.

My in-law’s worry confused me because it was wrapped in nice intention.  It kind of looked like love or even compassion; my husband was sure it was love.  I could see that they thought my inability to worry was a major character defect.  My telling them to stop was rude.

When lost in the illusion, we forget that we have an imagination that creates our life.  We should all be quick to tell people to let go of their beliefs that cause fear and worry; but often, we feel that we must accept their beliefs.

This problem is caused by level confusion.  At their physical level of reality, my in-laws were caring.  But at the mental level of reality, they were creating shit in other people’s lives.  I was attempting to free their victims although it would be years before I’d understand how to explain letting go.  Letting go of our fearful thoughts is truly compassionate; when we see this, we’re on the fast track to freedom.

 

Intuition Versus Inspiration

So many people think that their fearful thoughts and dreams are premonitions.  They don’t let them go; they spread them like viruses.  All fearful thoughts are false!

But let’s say a thought pops into your mind, and it feels calm and good.  Is it inspiration or intuition?  Inspiration happens when you’re exiting the illusion.  Inspiration moves you toward your spirit or True Self.  To get inspired thoughts, you need to have your navigational destination set on freedom.  You want your mind to be looking for exits.

Most people have set the direction of their mind on getting rich, getting approval, or winning; they want to do well inside the illusion.  They use intuition.  Tuition, you might notice, is a word associated with money and knowledge; in-tuition would be within knowledge or beliefs.

I once took a class on intuition, “Intuition for Business People.”  They told us to ask questions and then take what we got as the answer.

What they didn’t teach was discrimination because they didn’t have any.  They just assumed that if our mind said it, it was right.  Psychics say they do readings this way.  They trust what their mind gives them.  Kanye West said this is why he runs on stage at the Grammies; his mind tells him too.  People do dumb fucking things when they trust their mind blindly.  Many even think that God is guiding them — that’s how religions were invented.

 

Letting Go

I do tell people to do exactly what the psychics and intuitives do.  “Ask a question.  Don’t put answers in your mind, and just see what arises.”  The difference is that I tell them to let go of what arises.  Intuitives believe everything they get.  My “intuitive” friends never give good advice.  Their answers are only useful for those in the illusion.  This confused me.  I often felt bad for constantly rejecting their advice.

Intuition is the ability to maneuver among your beliefs and knowledge.  Intuitives have a good mental database manager that can find the best solution within their limited world view.  They do not get original information; nor do they get information that’s going to free anyone — that’s what inspiration does.

If you want to live from beliefs, follow your mind completely; and life kind of works. You keep putting more knowledge into your mind so you appear to have more options for the intuition to pick from. That’s why people become addicted to learning.

All knowledge was once someone else’s inspiration.  But knowledge is memorized.  When our mind is trained to look to memory for answers, it ignores inspiration completely.  We can’t find our creativity.

If you want to find your True Self, you allow your mind to speak; then you let go of whatever it says as untrue. You reduce the beliefs and knowledge in your mind until you’re completely clear.  Once you let go of all that false data, you discover concepts and ideas that are original, unique, and powerful.  You stop fearing and worrying.

Intuition is like a car with a decent, not great, navigator.  Inspiration, however, is like having the bird’s eye view of the entire world.  You can see everything; so you make choices from the knowing that you’re creating the perfect route and the perfect destination.  It’s only inspiration that will show you the exits to the illusion.  Intuition will just keep circling you round and round the desert in a nice, comfortable car.  And that car will run out of gas one day.

Sharing The Wisdom of Initiation

Sharing Freedom

By Cathy Eck

Sharing Initiation

After letting go for a while, we naturally want to share what we’re doing with others; and we should.  It’s a very important part of the process.  But often people get too anxious.  They want to become the next Tony Robbins.  They get frustrated when sharing doesn’t catapult them to fame and fortune.  That’s because sharing is really about getting feedback on our own clarity; and if we use the feedback, it will serve us well.

I spent years wondering how to share the initiates’ wisdom in a responsible way.  I didn’t get this information from any organization or teacher so I could actually share it without fear of having my tongue cut out; I took no such oaths.  I had no rules to follow.  The same goes for you.  But I came to realize very quickly that saying that our emotions point to false beliefs in our own mind — beliefs that people hold as absolutely true — was a little different than telling people to get positive and enthusiastic.

I realized that if I just gave people the final answer, they’d put that whipped cream wisdom on top of their existing manure beliefs; they’d never get free.  The self-help movement and New Age did enough of that.  Or, if I exposed beliefs but didn’t provide techniques on how to remove them, like conspiracy theorists do, it would be like cutting someone open on the operating table and telling them to go home.  What others were doing wasn’t helping people to get free.

 

Exposing Beliefs

I realized that I had to fearlessly expose false beliefs while supporting the process of letting go.  This required letting go of my fear of authority and the fear that I would be misunderstood or judged.   I had to let go of my fear of retribution and hell.  I had to let go of the notion of opposition or competition.  This took time … in fact years.  I was questioning beliefs that nearly everyone was sure were true.  And I still do…

As I’ve done the work on myself, my message has grown slowly and organically.  I write or speak only when inspired to do so.  Most important, blogging pushes me to let go of collective beliefs and beliefs that would not normally enter into my life.  We actually have far more beliefs than we realize.  We have beliefs about ourselves, others, authorities, and even the earth.

I wanted to create a space and a support system whereby people could become free like they did in the ancient world if they wanted to do so.  That meant not making freedom “right” or “good,” even though it was the only thing that felt right to me.

 

Wisdom Vs. Knowledge

Over time, I learned a few things about sharing this wisdom.  Here are some guidelines that I use:

0)  I don’t do it for money or fame.  As you let go, you move into abundance.  But it probably won’t look like you thought it would.  When you share something responsibly you don’t want to jump into fame.  People bring you beliefs that you’ve not yet let go; and it takes time to clear your mind.  If too many people come at once, you get overwhelmed with your own beliefs.

1)  I don’t share insights right away.  I share once I feel the wisdom has integrated within me — when it’s knowing, not knowledge.  Often our mind gets a glimpse of wisdom before we’ve cleared the contrasting beliefs out of our body.  This is why insights often feel fleeting at first.  They aren’t yet ripe for sharing.

2)  I don’t mix other processes and techniques with letting go EVER.  Very important.  EFT (tapping) isn’t letting go.  Drugs aren’t letting go.  Energy techniques aren’t letting go.  Therapy isn’t letting go.  Traditional motivational coaching isn’t letting go.  Meditation isn’t letting go.  Here’s why.  If we change our energy, raise our vibration, fix our words, or let go of our emotion, but we think/believe the same at the core, we’ll keep creating the same kinds of experiences and meeting the same kinds of people.  Letting go is about using emotions to find our beliefs.  We can’t find our beliefs if we’ve transmuted or tapped away our discriminating emotional system or covered it up with positive thinking or willful action.

3)  I don’t push letting go on anyone.   It’s an option — an opportunity.  However, I do calmly stand up for my True Self if someone tries to impose their beliefs on me.  That took practice!

4)  I constantly watch my own masculine mind to make sure I’m not projecting.  If I’m in a masculine role, and I fear, judge, or hate any other then they’re my reflection.  I’ve divided thought into good and evil or right and wrong.  I let go of what I see in them.  It’s not who they really are in truth.  Then my emotion goes away; and now I’m clear to share.  Most of the world spends their life fixing their own projections (often they bill for it).

5)  Write or speak to share, not to fix.  If I want to fix or change someone, I still see their beliefs as having power.  This is subtle and often overlooked.  When we see the illusion as powerless, which it is, we lose our desire to fix it.  We realize that beliefs harm the believers.  When the believers want out, we lend a hand.

6)  I never make the mistake of considering myself an expert or thinking I’ve arrived.  There are a lot of beliefs in this world.  Often the more we let go, the more beliefs we see.  I can’t let go of the truth or let go of too much.  In this way, my compassion grows.

I continue to let go and then take what I get as feedback.  Then I let go some more.  I expect to have less beliefs each day; and I make sure I achieve that.  That’s what I now consider a successful day.