Dealing with Fragile Egos as Characters

fragile ego

By Cathy Eck

 

Fragile Egos

When someone holds their beliefs as absolutely true, they become a “fragile ego.” Fragile egos exist at all levels of society.  We have to let them break to get free.

Fragile egos send a clear message:  “If you obey me, I’ll reward you.  If you disobey, I’ll punish.”  They’re clones of the Old Testament false God (imaginary leader of the illusion) who believe they’re good people with the right to judge and punish.

Whoever disagrees with them is evil or bad.  Their biggest fear is exposure.  They lie and impose their beliefs on others in order to look powerful while hiding their belief that they’re weak.

The most dangerous fragile egos wear a nice mask causing them to look like a True Self.  They say and do what the illusion considers good; they generally look happy and calm.  They believe that what you do, not how you think, makes you good.  Good, by their definition gets rewarded.  That’s how the illusion works.

But the true world doesn’t work that way.  Rules and projection don’t exist outside the illusion, we manifest what we believe.

Underneath the fragile ego’s mask is an emotional storm; their actions aren’t congruent with their thinking.  They’re filled with rules and beliefs.  When we disobey or say, “No,” to their demands, their emotions roar.  They don’t see their OWN thinking as the cause of their emotions.  They blame the feminine role because their Adam-and-Eve based mythology gave them the right to.

The fragile ego projects their responsibility and emotions outward.  In fact, when we’re conditioned by fragile egos, we often become overly responsible.  We take responsibility for their emotions because they claim we’re the cause.  We aren’t.

 

The Wall

In mentoring, I call the eruption of the fragile ego, “hitting the wall.”  Letting go looks impossible.  Strong religious, scientific, or political views look absolutely true.  Arguing with the fragile ego does no good.  The fragile ego repeats its knowledge, rules, and beliefs like a robot.  It sees evidence that supports its thinking; it’s sure it’s right.

We only see evidence because we believe the cause.  We hold a really strong belief, but it’s still false.  If we let go of the causal belief, we’ll see different evidence.  When we try to challenge fragile ego beliefs in ourselves or others, psychological reversals kick in.  The thoughts clearly generate emotion, they’re not win-win, and they’re taking us away from freedom; but we can’t remember that the emotion means false.  Until we routinely catch this in ourselves, we won’t catch it in others.

 

They’re Characters

Our OWN fragile ego consists of voice recordings acquired from others who forced their beliefs into our mind.  We did feel emotions when we first heard their words; but we were afraid to challenge them.  Their words are NOW constantly squatting in our mind.

After letting go for awhile, we do come to know that the recordings are false.  And yet, people tell me that the fragile ego is still running their life.   They still behave as the fragile ego would want them to behave or say what the fragile ego would consider socially or politically correct.  They still can’t be themselves.

 

An Exercise

Imagine yourself in the center of your mind; see the fragile egos who have limited your life with beliefs, rules, and knowledge in the periphery of a giant circle looking at you.  They’re keeping you from leaving the circle.

Review old memories in your mind. Bring up fragile ego encounters from the past. Let the fragile ego characters slowly replay the scene.  Discriminate and let go as they talk.  Also let go of any judgments or reasoning that arises in your mind about these characters. Judgment on your part keeps you stuck to them.  You might never see them again; but when you clean up their character in your own mind, you won’t meet that same sort of person again.  Of if you do, you’ll stay powerful.

You can take this even further.  We tend to think that we must change the real life fragile ego characters or get them to stop judging us.  But many of them will never change or stop judging.  Are you going to wait until they change to live your life?  I hope not.

Step into their character within your own mind.  Speak their beliefs, and feel their emotions arise when they speak something false or judgmental.  Assume they can discriminate and let go, and do so.  It’s your mind!  These are your characters! You have the power to clean up their words in your mind.  In this way, we change the past.

See if this fragile ego still has power over you.  If so, ask yourself, “Why?”  Let go of the reasons that your mind gives you.  Clean up more memories.

You aren’t affecting the real life person in any way — good or bad.  When your mind is clear, they won’t bother you.  Their beliefs will only affect them.

Our false minds were meant to be creative containers, separate and distinct from others people’s minds, so we could all create independently.  We’ve never had the right to impose our beliefs on others.  We only do it because others did it to us.

When you realize that you don’t deserve their judgment, they don’t have power over you anymore.  When you understand that their rules are false, they don’t apply to you.  If they say that you’re hurting them, you don’t take it in.  In fact, I’ll often say to fragile egos, “You’re telling me what I should believe; how can I be hurting you?”

Fragile egos can be difficult.  But we can get through that wall if we take our rock hammer and chip away one belief or memory at a time.  Eventually, we’ll break through their highly tinted glass.  We’ll escape their influence without fighting them.  When we clean our OWN mind, they lose their false power.  They can’t harm us anymore.

 

Stay Out of Other’s Minds (We Aren’t Meant to be Psychic)

Psychic

By Cathy Eck

 

Psychic Studies 101

When I was in graduate school, I took a class in psychic studies.  I’d just read the book, “Psychic Discoveries Behind the Iron Curtain,” and I fantasized about being able to make better business decisions or being able to detect people’s hidden motivations.  In class, we did these creepy exercises where you extended your energy into the other person’s energy field.  Then you said whatever you heard in your mind.  I felt like I was sticking my hands in raw sewage.  When they connected with me, I was even more creeped out.   Fortunately, my grade was dependent on how well I wrote about my experiences and not my success rate.

Although, one day we had to guess where our teacher was.  He was hiding somewhere in the city.  Someone came into class and said to draw whatever we thought.  I thought of a giant dick so I drew that.   Turns out he was standing by the water tower above.  So everyone thought I got it right.

Another time, we had to do a reading about someone based on name only.  I decided to go ice skating and write whatever I thought about while skating.  I wrote about rats.  Turned out my person was kind of a rat, a shrewd business wheeler-dealer.  He also had rats in his NYC apartment.  But quite honestly, his last name sounded like a mafia name.  It was a great metaphor.

Was I psychic, or was I just fucking around and happened to get some things sort of right?  I vote for fucking around.

 

Battered Minds

As part of the class, we had to attend a “Battered Minds” group meeting — professional psychics who were stuck in victimhood because they saw a vision of something bad, like 9/11.  I got up and walked out after a few minutes.  They were all compulsive whiners.  They believed every emotionally wrapped thought that entered their minds; they had absolutely NO discrimination.  They thought everything was about them.

Clearly they tapped into the collective illusion and saw 9/11 or some other tragic event.  But was that helpful?  To me, it only proved that they believed the illusion to be true and unchangeable.  I didn’t want to marinate in their world view.  The illusion won’t disappear until we stop believing it.

The purpose of a prophet is not to tell us the future so we can sit in fear and wait until the dreaded prophecy passes, declaring said prophet right or wrong.  It’s to recognize where we’re headed and to drop the thoughts that are causing that unwanted future from the collective conversation.

Psychic Studies 101 was many years ago, and I’ve done a lot of discriminating and letting go since.  The ancient ones were right.  Everything is mind.  The best place for our mind to be focused is on itself.  If everyone let go of their own unwanted thoughts, the world would be amazing in no time at all.

Most people are highly focused on other people’s minds.  In fact, I’ve mentored people pleasers who admitted that they often get in other people’s minds so they know what to say to please them.  False minds analyze and hold onto other people’s thoughts in order to look good, stay safe, keep them in their life, or say the right thing.  Our false minds have gotten erroneously connected and intertwined; and that’s why we’re all so damn confused.

Our job is our OWN mind.  If someone else’s experience generates emotion when we hear them talk, then it isn’t true for us.  If they want to make it true for them, that’s their prerogative.  But freedom is about being a master of our own mind; and that requires minding our own damn business.

 

The Lesson

We were required to experience a bunch of personal readings during that class.  I taped them all.  A few years ago, I listened to the tapes one last time before I trashed my tape recorder and tapes.  More than a decade had passed, nothing in them came true.  Nothing!  These were professional psychics, not students.

The future that they saw had been wiped off my mental hard drive.  They were reading my false mind, and I’d let much of that go.  Most of them tapped into my false desires and told me what I wanted to hear.  They picked up on my false fears and told me that they wouldn’t happen.  They said what I longed to hear to sooth my crappy beliefs.  They also gave me reasons for things that were happening in my life — spirit attachments, angels, karma, or past lives.  That was all bullshit too.  False minds love reasons.  But reasons are worthless.  The false mind has got 99 problems, and it’s causing all of them.

Intuition is also a false self skill that allows us to work around our beliefs.  It’s very helpful in the illusion, but it’s worthless if our goal is freedom.  Inspiration is what we want.  Inspiration comes from our True Self.  It’s usually silent.  We just find ourself doing something without much thinking at all.

Quite frankly, I wanted psychic or intuitive power because I was afraid of my future.  I’d become accustomed to being blindsided.  I wanted advance warning to avert problems.  I no longer trusted my True Self to keep me safe.  I’d become afraid of surprises because they were usually bad.

What I really wanted was to purify my false mind and take what I got, knowing that it would be what I wanted, needed, and earned.   I didn’t want to have a concrete and perfect plan; I wanted to be constantly pleasantly surprised.  I didn’t want to see the crappy illusion and grab only the good stuff.  I didn’t want to will the world into submission.  I didn’t want to know people’s beliefs and say the right thing to please them.  Psychic Studies 101 was very interesting but truly worthless.  So I closed that door and got back on the path to freedom.

 

Win-Win and Our Bodies

An apple a day

By Cathy Eck

Lose-Lose

People often write to me asking for help with physical problems.  My body has been a huge challenge for me, mostly because the illusion is filled with beliefs about our bodies; and people in my life had rigid body beliefs and enormous trust in experts.  I, on the other hand, found the things that people do to fix their bodies repulsive.  I’ve had a lot to let go, and I’m not done.  But I do know where I’m going.  Here’s what I’ve learned.

The illusion is physically or effect oriented.  We see something wrong in our bodies, and we go to an expert.  We trust whatever they diagnose.  We put their knowledge in our mind and hope it fixes our problem.  We ignore the fact that experts see what they believe — projection.

We ignore our True Self’s wisdom and our own emotional discrimination that’s probably screaming at us.  We’ve given false masters dominion over our body in so many ways, usually out of fear.  Until we confront our fears, they lie under the surface waiting to trap us one day.  We’re playing the health lottery; and the odds of winning are decreasing every day.

Fixing the effects of our false thinking causes slow mental degradation.  We dive even deeper in the illusion every time we fix effects.  We’ve given our money and power to someone else; we’ve put them in a false masculine role over us without realizing it.  We’ll need them again because the cause isn’t really gone.  Eventually, we’ll encounter a problem that no expert can solve.  If we have no awareness of our True Self, that problem will kill us or severely deteriorate our quality of life.  It’s insane that we call that normal.

When the illusion wins, we ALL lose because everyone has fueled beliefs.  It gets harder for anyone to break free.  It’s imperative that we stop feeding the illusion.

Now don’t get me wrong.  I’m not saying to go cold turkey regarding fixing bodily effects.  Sometimes we have to fix or minimize the effects to get rid of enough fear to let go.  The best way to fix a bodily problem is to follow what we believe.  But later, when things calm down, we should look for the cause and let it go.

 

Win-Lose 

Start with the easy stuff.  Recently I saw a quiz on Facebook that said, “Are you toxic?”  I knew what it would ask:  How often do you work out?  Do you drink?  Smoke?  How many servings of fruit and vegetables do you eat daily?  Do you eat fast food?  As I suspected, all the questions were physically oriented.  State of mind was ignored completely.

Health is the illusion’s new religion.  Athletes and models are our false Gods.  We deem their bodies perfect and strive to look like them.  Whatever makes them beautiful, we’ll buy and copy.

We’re hard wired to trust beautiful people.  But we must make sure that we know what beautiful really looks like.

According to the Facebook quiz, everyone should feel guilty and buy cleanses and diet plans and hire personal trainers.  When we’re told what to do, we’ll either rebel or blindly follow.  Either way, we’re supporting the illusion.  We’ll never find the top of the triangle.  The false God is a marketing genius.

This is hard for many people to see.  If they’ve fixed something with knowledge, a program, or practice, they don’t feel the discord of their own beliefs and knowledge anymore.  They judge those who aren’t fixing their effects in the same way.  They’ve projected out their definition of wrong on to those who eat wrong (in their opinion) or don’t work out.  If they stop their practice, their projection will come right back to them.  When we fix effects, we have to keep the belief in the fix alive.

 

Win-Win

If we get to our True Self perspective, we’ll eat and do what’s right for us.  The ancient people said that the body was the effect of the mind.  If we let go of all body beliefs, we’ll end up bodily wise and beautiful.  However, I suspect that we’d not recognize such beauty today.

Let’s design this toxicity test from the ancient perspective:  Do you love drama?  Whine?  Judge others or yourself?  Do you criticize your body?  Do you fix the effects of your body’s problems?  Do you hold rigid food and exercise beliefs?  Do you believe experts over your True Self?  If so, you’re mentally toxic to yourself and others.  You’re perpetuating the illusion of health and beauty.

Real transformation comes from the inside out.  It’s slow; we go through an awkward stage that makes us constantly want to turn back.  We find more beliefs than we can even imagine.

The mental test represents a perspective that heals the mind and the body; the physical test fixes only the body/effect.  Jesus himself said, “Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man.” (King James Matthew 15:11)  I like to quote that when my Christian friends behave like food police — shuts them up in a hurry.

The mental win-win perspective is fair to everyone.  The homeless person can practice letting go and be healthy, beautiful, and happy just like the rich person.  Everyone can be uniquely beautiful.

Someone who wants to hold on to their false self won’t like the mental test.  But it’s time for those who benefit from the illusion to lose their false power.  Sadly, the people who say they love us and care for us are often the ones killing us with their rigid beliefs.  As we muster the courage to challenge their beliefs, our body relaxes and heals.  Our True Self stays in power; and we return to our natural state of health, joy, and beauty.