Living the Masculine and Feminine Roles in Relationships

Earth as a mirror of our mind

By Cathy Eck

 

Getting Right Inside

I usually discuss the masculine and feminine related to roles; but the masculine and feminine are actually aspects of our own mind.  The correct inner relationship manifests correct outer relationships.  However, most people live as if the outer world and relationships create their thoughts.  They live life backwards.

In order to let go, we must move our attention inside of our mind.  We must take our focus off the belief-generated illusion and other people; we become inner directed.  Don’t confuse this with introversion.  Inner directed means our attention is on our OWN mind, not other people’s minds.  It means constant discrimination.

Whether we’re male or female, we came hard-wired with a masculine and feminine mind aspect — once called God and Goddess within  (True Self).  Living as a True Self is only possible when we let go of everything false from our minds.  We’re left with only true.  We now create in the physical world using only first-cause thinking.

When we’re thinking true thoughts, our inner masculine and inner feminine harmonize as one.  Our mind is unified (top of the triangle).  These are our most creative moments.  Our inner God now loves unconditionally and thinks only the truth or first-cause thoughts; hence our inner Goddess is creative and wise.  Our life works.

 

Inner Relationships Create Outer Relationships

Jesus said (paraphrasing), “Don’t do shit until you find the kingdom of heaven within.”  That was damn good advice.  If our inner masculine mind is a giant mass of beliefs and knowledge, our inner feminine mind will be emotional and non-creative.  What’s inside our mind creates what’s outside of us if we hold a masculine role.  When we don’t hold a masculine role, then we’re lowly cast members in the stories of the people who hold the masculine roles.

The true masculine leader was modeled after the sun.  The sun gives light and warmth unconditionally.  It doesn’t check to see if we’re worthy of it’s gift or ask for something in return.  Likewise, the masculine sexual organ gives.  Thus the masculine role was considered a giving/assertive role.

The feminine role was modeled after the moon or earth to reflect or absorb.  The sun, moon, and earth were metaphors for the mentally oriented masculine and feminine.  We assume that the sun sends pure light; but humans in the false masculine role send fluorescent (fake) light.

If the masculine mind or leader is like the sun (true) and loves the feminine unconditionally, the feminine reflects that unconditional love back like the full moon, or the feminine earth absorbs the sun’s rays and creates life.  However, if the false masculine mind or leader projects judgment, criticism, or discipline on the feminine, the feminine reacts unnaturally with emotion, rebellion, problems, or disease.

The True Masculine lets go of any thought that causes emotion or limits the feminine (not win-win).  But the false masculine doesn’t let go.  It thinks its beliefs are right and true.  It projects the unwanted part of it’s divided (second-cause) thinking on to its feminine using blame.  It believes that it can think false and get true.  That’s ridiculous, but that’s what it believes; it calls it discipline.

If we all lived as True Selves, creating would be cooperative with two or more whole people creating more than the sum of the equal parts.  A common goal or desire would unite people — not their beliefs.  The leader would hold the vision for the group — not impose beliefs or rules on them.

 

Reality of Relationships

The True masculine role is mentally oriented; its pure mind never gets tired of giving.  What effort does it take to think truth or love unconditionally?

The false masculine, however, is physically oriented; a false masculine mind says to physically give, sacrifice, or serve.  The false masculine leader (or God/Lord) gives discipline, rules, and beliefs.  It gives conditional love (rewards) and punishment.

Thinking false thoughts is exhausting.  But the false masculine is cunning.  It makes the rules and convinces others to do it’s hard work with lies while it receives the benefits, power, and credit.  Rules are false; they shouldn’t be obeyed.  But we’ve been psychologically reversed to obey.

A powerful false masculine leader (like royalty or a billionaire) feels balanced.  But, they’re not.  They’re living the beneficial side of both roles.  They have no compassion for their projection — the people living the shitty side of both roles who have no power and no rewards.  Thus the successful false masculine leader often does a little charity work or service to mask their projection and look generous.

False masculine leaders have no reason to change their mind, so we have to transform ours.  When we let go of their beliefs/rules in our mind even if they’ve created our reality in the past, we move into the True Masculine role naturally.  The true leader is the person with the purist mind in any situation.  They have more power than the balanced false masculine; they can make everything right.

In initiation, we don’t fight for the masculine role or win it by education, expertise, or knowledge.  We simply let go of all of our beliefs.  We let go of allowing others to project or impose their beliefs on us.  We let go of our judgments of others.  Our mind becomes clear and pure.  Then we rise naturally to the true masculine role.  It’s so subtle that we hardly even know we’ve done it.

In initiation, this was called becoming the Christ or the Son of God.  In religion, it’s called impossible.  Religion worships the false masculine; the false masculine always has an enemy or opposite like Satan.  The higher the false masculine rises in the system, the more it’s attacked by Satan.  However, when the True Masculine takes the lead, the false masculine loses its false power; it retreats or submits because it’s finally feeling its own emotions.  It’s pulled inward.  Its lies no longer work.  The war is over.

Love! The Most Confusing Word in the English Language

True Love

My daughter’s rescued dogs.

By Cathy Eck

 

Words are Crazy

I love the word fuck.  It’s so clear and versatile.  If I say, “What the fuck?”  You know what I mean.  If I say, “You look fucking gorgeous!”  We’re in harmony.  If I say, “Fuck you.”  You get my drift without any further explanation.

However, if I say “I love you,” now you’re confused.  Does she mean she like… really loves me?  Does she want to have sex with me?  An exclusive relationship?  To marry me?  Three little words, “I love you,” create more relationship confusion in one day than fuck has ever created — and people claim fuck is the bad word.  But don’t worry; fuck comes to the rescue.  If you say, “I fucking love you man.”  Now you are safe.  Confusion gone.

 

Love is Enough

Nothing feels worse than hearing someone say, “My love is not enough to….. (fill in the blank)”  The statement isn’t true.  But in desperate moments, those words often come out of people’s mouths.  They wonder if they’re being punished when they love something so much and can’t make it right or save it.  That’s love in the illusion.  If you choose to believe in it, you get the consequences.

Unconditional love is the most powerful force in the universe.  I’m certain that it’s enough.  But love has been so watered down and so misused that it’s lost its incredible power.

Let’s start with romantic love.  We use the term “fall in love” for a good reason.  We take our whole True Self and cast it aside so we can be half of another person.  We define a good relationship as becoming more concerned over whether they like us then whether we like us.  Therefore, it’s also common to say, “I lost myself in that relationship.

We believe that strong emotions mean love.  But since you read my blog, you aren’t falling for that trick, are you?  The emotion is saying that what we’re thinking right now is false.  That’s all.  Emotional chemistry means that this person gets us to think a lot of false thoughts. True love is calm.  And sex should be the effect of love, not a synonym for it.

 

That’s Not Love

Some of you were raised by parents who told you that discipline was love.  My mom would smack us with her big wooden paddle and then tell us she did it because she loved us.  WTF?  That wasn’t true then and never will be true.  She was getting an emotional release because her thinking about us sucked.  That’s not love.

Then there are the people who think worry is love.  When we worry about someone, we’re projecting our fear on them.  That’s not love.

There’s the notion that sympathy as love.  When we sympathize with another, we’re believing the same lies that they believe making it harder for them to fix their situation.  Compassion, where we know they’ve just accepted a belief that isn’t true, and we know they can let it go, is equal to love.  Compassion comes from the True Self.

Controlling or fixing another isn’t love.  Someone who says, “I want you to read this self-help book because I love you.”  That’s not love.  While I freely express my ideas on my blog, I don’t even make my own kids read it.  It’s there for people who want it.  True love doesn’t need support or validation.

People equate love with doing shit.  That’s not love.  I’ve been told that love is thank you cards, cleaning, various activities, offering to buy dinner, hugs, visiting, calling, squeezing the toothpaste from the bottom, handing over the remote, etc.  I’ve been told that love is gifts, surprises, and the right words.  And I don’t believe any of it.  Fuck you Hallmark and 1-800-FLOWERS.

It’s all an issue of good old level confusion.  At the mental level, love is simply making sure that what we think of another when we think of them is loving and true.  When it’s not, we let go.  That’s it.  The mental level is what’s true.

People who feel inclined to follow the socially acceptable laws of love, as described above, view life from the physical orientation.  They often do nice things while talking about you behind your back or secretly hating you in the privacy of their mind.  They can look loving without really being loving.  If we’re honest and honor our emotions, we’ve known it all along; but usually, we didn’t want to admit it.

Humans spend their lives trying to get love when all we can control is our ability to give it.  In my experience, that’s enough.  When we get our mind clear enough that another’s false self has no power over us anymore, they’re really easy to love.  Our love power returns.

 

Unconditional love

Unconditional love is a nice word pairing — kind of like steak and Merlot; but most people don’t really know what it means.  We can’t do unconditional love.  We can’t figure it out.  We can’t pretend it.  Love doesn’t have power until it’s unconditional, and it isn’t unconditional until we let go of our false definitions of love.  Sometimes, that’s a long list.

False love is power over another — possession, fear-driven, and controlling.  It only has the power that we believe it has.  True unconditional love is a creative, healing, and unlimited power.  But we can’t fake it until we make it.  The way out is awkward, emotional, and often scary.

Often we wake up one day and realize that all the things we thought we loved about others aren’t real; their masks are covering something we don’t want to see.  But True love doesn’t turn away because when we remember another’s True Self by letting go of the false we see in them, we meet them at the True Self level.  Then we see our own reflection and it’s fucking awesome.   And I know that you know exactly what I mean.

The Awkward Phase On the Path To Freedom

Awkward Phase

 By Cathy Eck

 

Awkward Phase

When I was little, I’d often find myself caught in some stupid habit or pattern of thought.  My mother would say, “Ah, don’t worry about it.  It’s just an awkward phase.”  What might have become an obstruction to my freedom, like OCD or a serious addiction, left about as easily as it came.

Those are great words to remember on the quest for freedom because it often seems like one big awkward phase.  The reason for this is that when you start to choose freedom (the True Self), the remnants of your false self show up so that you can let them go.  But often they look very real, important, and true.  Usually they involve others.  Let’s look at some areas where awkwardness shows up on freedom road.

 

Traditions

Let’s pretend that your family had a tradition of Uncle Joe dressing up like Santa and bringing gifts to the children every year.  Now you’re an adult; you’ve not believed in Santa for a long time.  All the kids are gone, but Uncle Joe still dresses up.  It no longer makes sense. It’s awkward.

But even worse, now that you’ve decided to live from your True Self, you find that you can’t lie anymore.  Lying obstructs our freedom; it feels bad — yes, even so-called white lies.  Uncle Joe isn’t Santa.  The tradition that once looked fun now looks abominable.

In time, every tradition looks wrong from the eyes of the True Self.  Traditions are just beliefs on a schedule.  Traditions serve the false self.

So you’re in a quandary.  You don’t want to ruin what others think is fun; but to pretend Uncle Joe is Santa, you have to honor beliefs that now look ridiculous.  Awkward!

 

Love, Heroes, and Care Takers

People who live with both feet planted in the illusion love heroes and often shine way too brightly in a crisis.  For twelve years, I lived in a rural Virginia town and never saw an auto accident; my friend saw them all the time.  She loved getting in there to help.  I started to wonder if she was helping or causing the accidents.

Love is defined in the illusion as rescuing people from their problems, honoring that they’re victims with no responsibility, and care taking or serving without whining.  Now do a 180 and head for freedom, and you realize that all suffering is the product of the beliefs we’ve borrowed.  You can’t bear to watch someone suffer, victimhood looks like a jail cell, and you abhor problems.  But what do you do with the problem lovers and victims in your life?  Awkward!

Then there is the flip side where you mess up and create some crap in your life.  You know you’re responsible, and you just want time alone to work it out and clear your mind.  But friends and family all want to help you.  They start to feel sorry for you, and you want to kill them.  Very awkward!

 

Intentions

The illusion is all about what you do and what is right and wrong according to the illusory rulebook you’ve chosen to follow.  Now you board the freedom train, and you recognize that intention is what really matters.  Your friend is whining about her bad child for the tenth time this week.  But you can see the truth.  Her story is contributing to her child’s behavior.  Social conventions say a friend is a good listener.  But you want your friend to have a great relationship with her child so you suggest that she drop her story.  Your friend gets very mad and says you’re rude.

Now who is really the rude one?  Is it more rude to bombard your friends with all your problems and victim stories; or is it more rude to say, “I think  you’d be better off if you dropped that story?”  Awkward!

Then there is the flip side where your friends are all talking about American heroes, war, their beloved political party, and pride in America.  They’re funneling tons of fuel into the illusion, and you say nothing.  They call you unpatriotic and say you don’t care about your country.  But you understand that they’re contributing to more war and problems for the country.  You don’t want to contribute to that.  So you look bad again.  Awkward!

 

Emotions

You work very hard on your mind and more and more you realize that if you are thinking something that generates emotion, it isn’t true.  So when your family or friends piss you off, you go to work on yourself.  They start to think they’re perfect.  They never cause a problem anymore.

But then you do something that causes them emotion, and they blame it on you.  They still think that others cause their emotions, and they have no intention of letting what they see in you go.   Even worse, most of the time you didn’t do what they thought you did.  They just caught a glimpse of their own reflection.  Now just try to explain that you didn’t do what they’re sure you did.  Super awkward!

 

The Cause

None of these situations are fun.  In fact, they often make you feel like moving to a remote deserted island.  You feel like the world is just too crazy to live in.

What causes these awkward moments is that in the illusion, we’re trained to see though the eyes of other people or other beings like the old-man-in-the-sky God.  When we move toward freedom, we start to see the world through clear eyes.  However, we still remember how others saw us before.  We’re meeting the past moments that caused us to adopt someone else’s rulebook and abandon our True Self.  Old fear arises that we’ll be judged, humiliated, or punished.  But that can’t happen if we just remember to let go.

What looks like an awkward moment really is one more opportunity to gain freedom.  As long as we remember to let go, it really is just a phase.

 

 

 

When It Feels Like Our Love is Not Enough

Path of Venus and the apple

By Cathy Eck

 

 

When Love Is Not Enough

Years ago, I met a sweet woman who was going through a tragic situation with her son.  At the time, I didn’t know how to let go of beliefs, but I could see that she had a very big belief.  She said it over and over again.  “How can I save my son if my love is not enough?”  I doubt that there’s a person alive who has not thought those words at some point in their life.  We all long to save the people we hold dear, and often we suspect that we just don’t have enough love.

I couldn’t get her story out of my mind for years even though I lost touch with her.  It felt completely wrong to me that we would be living in a world where our love is not enough.  Yet, I too had that belief.  I had memories to prove it.

Then I came to understand beliefs.  When we believe words, they become our truth.  We see proof of our belief/truth in the world, then we believe it even more.  We get caught in an infinite loop with no exit.

 

Conditional Love

Love is not enough because most love in this world is conditional or romantic.  Half people who complete each other or caretakers who simply do what others say is right or proper are operating at the level of the false self; and in the illusion, love is not enough.  If love was enough, the illusion would end.

You see, love is the most powerful force in the universe because it supports the truth while simultaneously dissolving the false. Thus if you can unconditionally love any situation, disease, or enemy, the false disappears.  But we can’t fake unconditional love, and beliefs mask it.  So most people can’t express it.  Their cure, their joy, their freedom is right inside of them; and they cover it up with beliefs that they have borrowed from others.

 

The Fall

I came to realize the meaning of the fall, and why our love is not enough, one day while eating an apple.  I don’t like apples and rarely eat them; but I’d wondered why they used the apple in the story of Adam and Eve.  I thought eating one might help.  I cut the apple in half and saw the picture above.  The symbolism immediately fell into place.  Thankfully, I didn’t have to eat it to get the answer.

The photo above shows the inside of my apple; it has a five-pointed star in the arrangement of the seeds.  The five-pointed star is also drawn by tracing the movement of Venus over eight years and five days.  Venus (Greek Aphrodite) was associated with love.  However, she’s associated with human love, not unconditional love.  Thus her love is dual in nature.

 

moving the points in the pentagram

So when Adam and Eve ate the apple, they ate the apple of the illusion (duality), where the knowledge of good and evil reigns supreme.  If you look at the five-pointed star with one point on top, it looks like the Vitruvian Man.

Just like the triangle process, one point is on top and duality is on the bottom meaning that we’re living within duality, but we put our True Self first.  Ideally, we lead with unconditional love and simply use the illusion or duality for its creative potential (called first-cause creation).  People who do this often capture our hearts; they put the wisdom of the heart (True Self) in front of their head (false self).

On the other hand, if we turn the five-pointed star upside down, we get something with horns, which is where Satan came from.  Satan, or the horned devil, often is depicted as a goat. The goat was associated with Old Capricorn on the Zodiac.  He wasn’t the Creator God (Genesis I); he was an earthly God with lots of baggage like the Roman Saturn or the Greek Zeus.

When duality comes first, good-evil, win-lose, dominance-submission, or right-wrong are the foundation (second-cause creation).  Competition is normal and accepted.  The devilish part of humans (false self) says it loves us or cares for us while it’s actually limiting us.  It says it loves us as it requires us to believe its lies and obey its rules.  It says it’s caring for us while projecting its beliefs on us.  It loves us when it beats us in competition and makes us the enemy when it loses.

 

Unconditional Love or Old Capricorn?

It is our choice, which way we use our mind.  Which Venus do we honor?  Pay attention when you see the five-pointed star because those who use it usually know the difference between the one point up and the reverse.  It is an old, old symbol.  It speaks volumes.

Sadly, the God of the Old Testament was modeled after Saturn, Old Capricorn.  When we put that God before us, we live from conditional love and reward and punishment; then our love is not enough.  But when we let him go, our spark of the Creator God comes alive.

 

Isis

The answer can be found in another loving goddess, Isis (Egyptian).  Isis was the wife and sister of Osiris, the Sun God.  When her lover/brother was tricked and cut into pieces, Isis brought him back to life (she re-membered him) because she had a pure virgin mind and unconditional love.  She remembered who he really was.  The virgin mind was a mind with no beliefs.  It creates anew with ease.  (A virgin body doesn’t mean a damn thing so have all the sex you want.)

When we let go of conditional love, we’re left with the heavenly man.  The Vitruvian Man stands within the squared circle, the symbol for the union of heaven (circle) and earth (square); he’s perfect.  He’s free.  This man was the ancient high initiate, who used his body as a temple for his True Self (his God within).  For this man or woman, love is enough.

 

How Do You Know if it’s True Love?

Unconditional love Sun

The sun symbolized unconditional love in the ancient world because it gives without conditions.

By Cathy Eck

Knowing True Love

Love is a very confusing subject.  We talk about “falling” in love as a good thing.    People attach sex, romance, and chemistry to love, which nearly guarantees our fall.  One thing for sure, true love is never found in the traditional ball-and-chain relationship.  True love is like the sun; it is what we experience when we give  unconditionally.

I have to admit, “falling” in love took me on a giant life detour.  I buried my True Self with beliefs in relationship.  But one day, I could no longer pretend that fallen love was the real deal.  I wanted only True Love, and I was willing to do what it took to find it.  I didn’t yet realize I had it all along.

 

False Love Languages

Recently, Oprah interviewed Gary Chapman, the best-selling author of “The Five Love Languages.”  His book sold millions of copies; people credit it with saving their marriages.  However, Mr. Chapman has a severe case of true love and false love level confusion. The book should be called, “The Five False Love Languages.”

You take a questionnaire to find your love language — or what you need to feel loved.  Then your partner is supposed to give you what you need, i.e., speak your love language.  The author said the best question to ask your partner is, “What do I need to do to fill your love tank?”  To me that sounded more like a question a perverted gas station attendant would ask.

The love languages were as follows:

Words of Affirmation

Quality Undivided Attention

Gifts

Doing Acts of Service

Physical Touch

Here’s the key.  Our natural true masculine state of being gives unconditionally (like the sun); our natural true feminine state reflects (moon) or absorbs (earth).  We all have both masculine and feminine aspects within our minds that ideally work together.

In relationship, we play the masculine or feminine role; we project the other role out and interact with it.  If the one in the masculine role is giving true love, the feminine reflects it back.  The love continues to flow endlessly.

In true love, our True Self gives what we love to give.  If we’re joyous, we give joy.  If we’re wise, we give wisdom.  If we are spontaneous, we share our spontaneity.  If we’re funny, we make the other laugh.  The love we feel in this giving is the reconnection of two True Selves (often called soul mates), each playing a different role.  This giving is effortless; we don’t wear out giving our True Self because it is unlimited.

We actually feel love when we give it; but our false self tells us we feel it when we receive it.  

This is where people get confused.  You can see this clearly in the parent-child relationship.  When the baby first arrives, you feel so much love because you see only perfection in the baby even though the child is just eating and pooping.  You give unconditional love to the child.  They reflect your true love back.

Since you feel love, you think the child is giving love to you.  But what you’re feeling is the purity and lack of emotion that occurs when you think loving true thoughts.  You don’t yet have beliefs about the child.

 

Why Does True Love End

Eventually, the child does something that we label “bad,” and they feel the disconnection from the parent.  They eventually find the key to fixing that disconnect and that becomes part of their love language.  Maybe they hug the parent, now hugs mean that everything is okay.  We are connected again.  Love goes from unconditional giving to fixing the lack of love with behaviors.  If love morphs into sacrifice or duty, we’ve about hit bottom.

“The Five Love Languages” provides a fix for this false love dilemma.  The test exposes the childhood wound that needs fuel.  So if the person fills our empty tank with a kind word or touch, we feel loved for a little while.  But just like our gas tank, it will soon be empty again.

 

Fixing the Cause

We hug the person at intermittent intervals and this fixes the effect (empty tank) instead of the cause (childhood wound).  But come on, is that hug really love or is it just socially-acceptable manipulation?

The initiates said that it’s stupid to fix effects.  They’re right.  Do you really want to fill tanks with gifts, touches, doing laundry, or words of affirmation for the rest of your life?  Most of us do until we just can’t do it even one more time; then we run like hell, die, or wake up.

The goal of initiation was to live a life of unconditional love.  When the initiates reached this state, they were said to be like Gods (or like the sun).  They were powered by fuel that never runs out.

Initiates never played games; they’d never be half of a whole.  Two initiates would be two whole people that make more than the sum of one plus one.  They would be a creative partnership where each wants what the other’s True Self naturally gives.  When you step on the path of initiation, you stop filling tanks.  But you will help another heal their wounds and return to true love.

The good news is that you don’t need to know anyone’s love language because that isn’t true love anyway.  True love is natural, and we never get tired of expressing it.  The more we give true love, the more true love we feel.  That is because true love was perfectly designed to be felt when we gave it.  In that way, the love you feel is only limited by your beliefs, which limit your capacity to give.  That is insanely fair because everyone can give unconditional love, even when they are completely alone.

 

photo credit: Kuzeytac (will be back soon) via photopin cc

When Love Doesn’t Seem to Be Enough

Martin Luther King Quote

By Cathy Eck

 

Love — A Powerful Force

A burning question erupted in my mind when John F. Kennedy was assassinated.  My mother said he was good; so how was it possible to kill him?  In my mind, good, positive, truthful, free, and unconditionally loving were all the same.  I felt strongly that love was a force that kept one safe.  But no one agreed with me; and in time, I came to believe them.  I learned that human good is different from True-Self good, and human good (or obedience) is what authorities wanted from me.  People thought my question was too big to ask.  I suspect it was too right to ask.

 

Adam and Eve

We’re taught that after their dirty deed, Adam and Eve were cursed by God; the door to paradise was locked.  They got us stuck for eternity in the land of good and evil.  But was the gate locked by God or was it locked by beliefs?  Could we let the beliefs go, and unlock the gate?  Another one of those “too big” questions, perhaps?

We’ve been convinced that heaven’s gate was locked.  We were convinced that good and evil are equal players in a never-ending battle.   We were convinced that a good person can be killed by evil.  But are any of these beliefs true?  Or have we just been conned to support an illusion that benefits the few at the expense of the many?

We believed these ideas because we were taught them by authority as children.  We didn’t realize that whatever beliefs we accepted as true would slide quietly into our mind and hold us hostage within an illusory reality; we were never told that we could discriminate and let beliefs go or that our love would keep us safe.  Only the ancient initiates were given that little piece of truth, which is why the initiates looked like Gods compared to the rest of us mortals.

 

The Key

People who died by assassination, like Martin Luther King, were rebels who exposed and fought the elite rulers.  The elite rulers have been the winners of the illusion for thousands of years.  We follow their belief — beliefs that were stacked to favor the patriarchal elite, not the little guy.  The rebels wanted the people in power to change their minds and adopt equality-centered views.  But why would they?  They were winning.

The initiates knew how to take our power back even when we were in a lesser role.  They said that nothing can exist in our experience until we accept a belief that allows the experience into our mind.  If we remove the causal belief, we can’t be harmed.

People who win at duality are experts at planting causal beliefs in the minds of the people that they want to control.  Slavery is the goal of the illusion.  The ability to discriminate and let go is, in fact, the great equalizer.  But hardly anyone knows how.

Martin Luther King had a True-Self vision of freedom; but he was stuck in the same false world as we are.  He tried to change the illusion.  But we can’t change or defeat the illusion; we must let it go.  Then it slowly dissolves like the Wicked Witch in the Wizard of Oz who was doused with water.

 

The Way Out

Each belief we hold in mind gives some of our power to authority.  It sounds counter-intuitive, but our fear disappears as we let beliefs go.  Our safety improves as our fear disappears.  False power diminishes because the disempowering beliefs and fear that we let go boomerang right back to those who sowed the seeds in our mind.  This is true justice — redemption without revenge.

If an authority figure can’t project their fear on to others, events are pulled into their life that push them off their pedestal.  They lose their special charisma that people fall for.  The truly good win without a fight.  In fact, no one loses in this deal because those who lose their false power gain the truth that sets them free too.

 

Getting to Love

According to the initiates, we must cease judging, hating, and fighting; instead, we must free our own minds.  We must become someone who can’t be another’s projection screen.

The big questions are the ones that free our minds because they take us to the truth.  That is why it is frowned upon to ask them.  They dissolve the illusion.

In my experience, people often have a deep core belief that their love is not enough to keep them safe.   But that is just not true.  Ultimately the goal is just as Jesus said, “Love your enemies.”  He didn’t say that so we’d be nice; he said it so we’d be powerful and safe.

I didn’t want to love my enemies at first.  It felt like I was letting them off the hook.  But I realized that I enabled the authorities in my life by believing their lies.  I trusted them because I didn’t know how to discriminate between true and false as a child.  Now I do.  Now I can strip them of their false power by letting go and unconditionally loving them — not because they deserve my love but because it renders them powerless.  It is never too late to take back our power and live our perfect life.

I don’t know how long it takes to clean out our mind completely and reach total unconditional love because I’m not there yet.  But I do know that I’m safer when I let go.  I’m healthier and happier when I remember to let go.  I have less fear and more choices when I let go.  Most important, I have more unconditional love.  I carry the most powerful weapon of all in my holster as long as I remember to just let go.

 

Think you still need your beliefs, read this one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ending the Fighting, Living from Win-Win

Change our mind Change the World

By Cathy Eck

 

Fighting Versus Win-Win

In the path of initiation, our mind unravels in three levels of reality.  The first level disappears when our personal reality shifts, and we are left with an understanding of who we are and where we fit in the world.  The second level involves our relationship to others, and the third involves our relationship to the world.  This second-level event in my life didn’t make any sense when it happened in the early 90’s, and it was profoundly embarrassing.  Now I look back and just smile.

Until 1997, I owned a technology business.  My company was hired by a nonprofit organization, run by several retired generals, to design and implement a new membership and accounting system.   I partnered with another company owned by my friend Barry, who happened to be Middle Eastern.  Barry and I completed many projects together; this would be easy for us.

Within a few weeks of implementation, Barry and I noticed some things that the generals didn’t consider.  We saw opportunities to improve their system by upgrading things and shifting the paper flow.  So we went to meet with the generals.  Barry explained the situation, but clearly their bias toward his nationality and accent started to kick in.  They got very angry with him.

 

The Feminine Speaks

I had no idea what came over me, but I started to cry.  This was not what a professional did.  I tried to mask the tears by pretending to rub my eyes, only causing mascara to smear on my face and make things worse.  One general looked at me and said, “Something wrong?” in a general-like voice.

I cut loose.  “We came here to tell you how we could make your system better.  We are offering to do more work for the same money, giving you more than you asked for.  All you can hear is that we want an extra week to do it.  You act like you’re fighting a war when we’re on the same fucking team.  I just don’t know if I can work with assholes like you.  Life works better when you don’t perceive everyone as the enemy to be defeated.  But how would you know that?”  I fully expected that they would fire me and ask for their deposit to be returned.  But I didn’t care.  Barry was my friend and partner; and I had his back.

The head general looked at the others and said, “She’s right.  We do approach everything in this stupid organization like we’re at war.  Quite frankly, I’m sick of it too.  We can’t even recognize when someone is doing us a favor.”  He looked at me and said, “I’m so sorry; take as long as you need.”  We proceeded with the job and everything was perfect after that.

The next week, the general took me to lunch.  He said that he didn’t know how to thank me.  I had broken his military mindset; he felt human again.  He winked and said his wife adored the new man he’d become.  We remained friends until I moved away.  He sent me tons of business and became one of my biggest supporters.

 

The Power of Win-Win

What happened that day looked like pure magic.  But it’s boilerplate for how our emotions are designed to work.  When the generals started behaving from win-lose, I showed emotion.  They played the fallen masculine, and I played the feminine reflection.  When the general got the message and moved to win-win, the emotions stopped; and we easily came to a perfect resolution.

I didn’t consciously know what I was doing at the time; but some part of me did.  It is the template for the perfect male-female win-win relationship in the outer world and the perfect male-female mind relationship in the inner world (the alchemical marriage).

 

Emotions Lead to The Causal Belief

Once I accepted win-win as my new way of living, I discovered the power of emotions and how they could lead us to our beliefs.  I eventually learned how to let go of our beliefs and remain in win-win.

Not everyone was like my general friend.  Most people wanted to hold on to the fight and continue to go for the win.  But as I cleared more and more of my own win-lose mindset, they’d usually go fight with someone else.

After that day, giving in to win-lose interactions felt horrible.  The other person wanted win-win too, but they didn’t know it.  So even when they won our win-lose conflict, they fought more.  Win-lose is the root of all addictions and problems.  The more you chip away at the pile of bullshit that forms it, the less you want to play the games.

 

Tragedies are Caused by Win-Lose

People create tragedies just to experience win-win. The initiated said that we lose our power over nature and she screams when we forgot that we were born to cooperate.  As above, so below means that the world works the same way the mind works.  Win-win minds will one day manifest a win-win world.

Terrorism, shootings, bombings are all caused by win-lose belief systems perpetuated by religion and politics.  When something horrible happens, people stop competing and cooperate for the greater good.  But then life goes back to normal and they bring out the gloves.  The cycle perpetuates because the cause (the win-lose mindset) is never fixed.

I’m no longer interested in honoring those who ban together in a tragedy or fight well in a war.  They aren’t heroes; they are looking for relief from their suffering.

I’m interested in the man or woman who chooses win-win to avoid the tragedy, before they have something to gain, just like my general friend.  His medal of honor in Vietnam was worthless in his daily life.  He became a true hero when he quit fighting wars and found the magic of win-win.  He got the highest reward in life; he found his True Self.

 

Is end of war possible?  I think so.